Cries of a Dead Heart
by EternallyLovely18
Summary: She lost her meaning to life. Everything has gone so wrong lately, and it seems like things are continuing downhill. Can the Cullens help and give her a meaning to live, and a family? Or will she find love in all the unneeded places?
1. On my own

_**Chapter 1**__: On my own_

Starring in the mirror felt odd. My dark brown hair now sported burgundy steaks and flowed inches past my small shoulders. I only ever wore blue jeans, and polo shirts, but my style just darkened to adding a little deeper eyeliner and darker shirts. This is my new look, my new home, my new life. Life without _him_ is going to be excruciating. Part of me is still pondering the whole Volturi suicide deal, but I knew he would be very angry with me right now if he knew what was going through my head, if he were even alive that is.

I sucked in a deep breath, and finished my hair. I was now more edgier, darker hair, and definitely darker moods. But I'm alone now so why should I even try. I don't even have my family. they would freak out if I just came up on their doorstep after 'dying' nine year ago. I knew this day would come. That one day he would leave or die. It would have been nice to have spent longer with him, but he gave me him, fir even the shortest amount of time, so i couldn't complain. He was all I ever hoped for, but it ended too soon. And I thought that maybe, just maybe we would get a few centuries together, but I'm not that lucky. Never have been. Never will be.

"Chill out C.J." I muttered to myself as I bent over and picked up my purse from the floor. Since I really didn't have any reason to be at home sulking in my own misery I decided to enroll in school. Meet some people who I would sooner or later never see again. No school is good, it's one more thing to help me keep my mind off of _him_, at however long I could actually do that for. However it would have probably helped had I fed sooner, I thought to myself, noticing my eyes getting darker in color. They aren't dark enough to notice, just to make me irritable, and my thirst just a little harder to control. I'll just put on my best face and act like I want to be there.

I walked out of my empty house taking one last look at it before I left for the day. It was very nice, simple, white and elegant. Everything I had dreamed of, too bad it just wasn't the life I dreamed of. I stepped into my car quickly before I could become even more depressed, if that were even possible. Ha, who's ever even heard of a depressed vampire? But I did bend most rules. I was one of the now smaller population of 'vegetarian vampires'. That's what he called himself. I was still basically a monster, but I didn't harm people, just the same as him. It seems that no matter what I think about, the end conclusion always ends on something about _him_. Noticing that made the spot where my heart should be twist in agony. It I were human I would be sobbing uncontrollably. Maybe it's too soon to be on school. Maybe I could just wait another year. The thought of just ending all the pain was so overwhelming it actually frightened me. But there was no reason to go on. there is no reason for life anymore. I'm basically already dead. I killed my soul to spend eternity with him. I let him make me like this because I thought he would always be by my side. The thought never crossed my mind that on day i would have to be without him. I shoved my key in, and cranked the ignition in the same swift movement. I will try to make it. I will try to go on. I need school right now. I need to think straight, and make sure this is really what I want. I slammed down on the gas and took off down the narrow dirt road running to the highway.

My car was simple, but enough to stand out in the parking lot aside from the red thunderbird I chose to park next to. I had a convertible top black Mercedes Benz. It was efficient, but he always wanted me to get something with more power like his Porsche. But I was very happy with my car. I silently scolded myself. I should try harder not to let my thoughts trail in that direction, the end conclusion is always painful, and I don't know how exactly I would explain my reactions if the memories got too bad. I've never been very good at hiding my emotions.

The scent hit me hard when I stepped into to office. I really haven't been around humans in a while, I thought meekly. Maybe I should have thought of that ahead of time. I quickly grabbed my compact mirror out of my purse, to study my eyes, They hadn't darkened that much, but I definitely needed to hunt when I got out of school. I could last that long. At least I hope so.

The woman named Ms. Cope, sitting behind the tall desk, handed me my schedule while eyeing me skeptically, like she was afraid, but then suddenly smiled.

"I'll just need you to get this signed by all of your teachers, and bring it to me at the end of the day" she perked "Have a great day, I know you'll love Forks high School"

"Ok, thanks" I smiled as nicely as I could manage, restraining the urge to pounce on her, and stepped out of the office with my newly acquired schedule in my binder tucked under my arm. I walked around until I saw the building I was suppose to be in. I walked at a human pace to my first class. I had quickly glanced at my schedule, since I was in a hurry, and couldn't get to class in time without making a scene or causing suspicion. That's the last thing I need right now. I walked into the small musty classroom, and immediately hated my enhanced senses. The room smelt strong of cheap cologne, mixed with chalk, and B.O. I covered the disgusted look on my face, as I turned to face my classmates. They were pretty average looking kids, just pale and cold. I walked over and handed my paper to the teacher who introduced himself as Mr. Latiner. He pointed out a desk far in the back of the room, and I gracefully made my way down the aisle feeling the stares penetrate into the back of my head. I sat between a semi-good looking boy and a wide window. He had ocean blue eyes, and black hair tousled in every direction.

I quickly averted my eyes to my schedule.

**Class ****Teacher Rm **

1st Literature: The Basics Latiner 504

2nd Biology Banner 302

3rd Algebra 2 Jordan 101

4th Art History Alvarez 502

Lunch

5th Geography Conner 212

6th P.E. Kennedy GYM

I froze, OH CRAP!

I can't take P.E. I definitely wouldn't be able to blend in there. I have to change this before the end of the day.

"Hey" I looked over, it was the dark-haired boy sitting next to me speaking. I flashed him a smile. He looked me up and down seeming to appraise me. He smiled when he looked back up to my face. I was extremely uncomfortable. I gave him a half-smile looking quickly back at my desk. I knew exactly what was going through his head, it was written all over his face.

"I'm Zack" He beamed at me when I looked back at him. I thought about answering him for a second, and figured it couldn't do much harm.

"I'm C.J." I whispered. He stared at me confused.

"My real name is actually Cameron-Jade" I clarified "But I go as C.J."

He nodded, and looked impressed, which was odd. Great, I thought, I have my first admirer. I knew it was going to happen, I just didn't think anyone would actually pursue their interest. The bell finally rang after an agonizing ninety minutes. I heard two girls talking about 'the new girl' as I bent over to pick up my purse. they were about five desks away, and were certain that I couldn't hear them. Which only made it all the more hilarious.

"I swear Jane, if that new chick even_ looks_ at Brian" she shivered in anger "I'll rip her head off"

I would love to see her try the one.

Walking towards the front of the row I heard the brunette girl 'Jane' respond.

"I don't think she will be interested in Brian, Kim" Jane muttered "It looks like she's already got more than him swooning over her". Well apparently Brian was in this class with us.

Suddenly, a blonde boy about six feet tall walked towards me. I stole a glance over at the girl Kim. She was glaring daggers at me. Apparently this is Brian. He wasn't very bad looking actually, but it's not like I was going to get involved with a human. I knew better than that. Kim doesn't have to worry about the new girl. I couldn't help chuckling when I thought of her empty threat. I saw a huge smile spread across his face, and realized that he had mistaken my humor as flirting. Not good. Kim's glare on me deepened, and she walked over to stand beside him, about three feet away. He was obviously on the football team. He had on a huge letterman jacket, and I could tell he was semi-built.

"Hey new girl" Kim sneered at me. I glanced at her quickly.

"It's C.J." I tried very hard to stay serious, and keep from laughing at the expression on her face. I think she actually wanted me to be afraid of the face she was making at me. If I was human I might have been a little intimidated. Probably not. She just looked like she was sucking on a lemon. The blonde guy just looked at me like I was the most interesting thing he's seen all day, maybe even ever. Oh imagine that.

"Hey I'm Brian" he said, as if oblivious to the pure hatred radiating off of the small girl standing next to him.

This is going to fun, I thought to myself.

"Hey Brian" I put on my best flirty face "I'm C.J." He seemed appalled that a girl of my standards would be attracted to him. Too bad I'm not really. I quickly dodged around them snickering under my breath. I really shouldn't do that to people, but that girl was making it too easy, and entertaining. My next class was two buildings down. Hopefully I didn't have any more classes with either of them. I really, really hope not.

My next class -Biology- was my best subject. I was very grateful of that. The room was rather small with little chart attached to the walls around the room. One I distinctly remember as a diagram of a flatworm - gross. I quickly walked over and handed the teacher my schedule. He signed it and made me actually introduce myself to the class. Oh yay. I hate attention.

"My name is Cameron-Jade Byers" I announced "but, call me C.J. that's what I go by". I got many varieties of looks from around the room. Hatred glares, curious stares, and the ever most popular dazzled expression. I held in a chuckle as I saw one guy in the front row drop his jaw. I bet they've never had to deal with anything like me. I quickly averted my eyes to the floor and moved swiftly towards my seat, trying to force the stares off of me with my mind. It didn't work. I was about two feet from my desk when the air cut on and swirled the air around the room. That's when I smelt it. The strangest smell I've ever encountered in my entire life, an odd mix like it had both vampire AND human in their blood. I couldn't pick out who it was coming from, and I knew I looked like an idiot just standing there inhaling this strange odor. Of course nobody else could smell it. I heard a low growl and immediately went into a defensive pose without thinking.

"Um excuse me" I now recognized Mr. Banner's voice, looking at me like I had gone crazy, and I realized the noise was coming from me. I straightened myself back up and closed the few steps to my desk sitting down next to a fairly small girl. She had straight long blonde hair and an expression like she smelt something bad. I don't think me and my lab partner are going to be the best of friends. But I decided to be nice anyways.

"Hi, I've taken this class before so you don't have to worry about me getting you a bad grade" I smiled. She looked at me confused, and for a moment I actually thought she was going to be friendly, but quickly covered her face in a bitter mask.

"I know what kind of person you are" she snapped "I've seen 'em all before. Just don't mess with my boyfriend, Alex, and I _might_ consider not making this the worst teenage years of your life. I run this school, so don't cross me" she concluded her little rant with the same twisted expression, mixed with her being pleased with herself that she 'stood up' to the new girl. Like that would be the worst of my problems. If only she knew my teenage years had been and gone, while she was still trying to learn the alphabet.

"I'll do my best" I stiffled a laugh as I turned my attention towards the front of the room. I could tell it pissed her off, I could literally feel her fuming next to me, but she didn't say anything more.

I moved my binder to the double desk I shared with the 'Spawn of Satan', and began taking notes. The class wasn't hard at all to keep up with, but that's probably because I've taken it before. The bell finally rang letting us go. I let her get a head start so I didn't have a chance of running into her in the hallway. When I stood up I smelt it again. I looked towards the front of the class, and saw what the smell was coming from. She was standing in front of the air conditioning and laughing with oone other girl I presumed as her friend. She had long dark bronze curls that ran down to her waist, and dark brown eyes. She looked at me, confusion filling her face, then her eyes widened in panic. Did she know what I was?

"Umm Karen I got to go" I heard her speak to her friend, quickly dodging out of the room. Her friend walked out after her, and I just stood there looking like an idiot. Who was she, and more importantly _what_ was she? I received many curious glances while just standing there. I quickly ran out of the room at a human's pace. What was this world coming to? I thought, leaning against the side of the building, outside.

"Hey you're the new girl right?" I heard a female voice from behind me. Great, this was about to begin. The 'new girl nickname'. When no matter if that person knew your name or not that's what you were considered. It sucks. I spun around quickly ready to see a hatred expression upon her face, but it wasn't. She was actually smiling at me. I recognized her face, but where from I'm not sure. She waas very short , had straight black hair, and was almost as pale as me.

"Ummm yeah" I studdered "Why are you being nice to me?" she chuckled.

"Oh. I suppose most girls here wouldn't be nice to you" she quickly apologized when she thought she said something hurtful "What I mean is that they feel threatened by you being here, I'm Karen". I quickly filled in the blanks. This was the girl that was talking to that…..thing, whatever she was.

"Who was you're friend…the one that left just a few minutes ago?"

"That's Nessa" she said quickly "She started here two years ago". So she started as a freshman. I suppose I should have done that, but I don't think I could pull it off. It would have given me more time here. But her. She looked older, and if she had vampire in her than more than likely she looked like that as a freshman. She looked older.

"We're going to be late" she broke through my thoughts. I noticed I was about three minutes from being late to Algebra. I sped off down the sidewalks as fast as a human possibly could, and was there before the bell rang. The rest of the day flew by in a blur, still nobody talked to me. I got a few glares, and a couple of guys got near to asking me out, but I always dodged around them before they could speak. Karen was nice to me, and I sat next to her in lunch, but I assumed that it was only because her friend had left early.

Next class was gym. I quickly wrote a note and walked swiftly to the office. The room smelt like TV dinners and cheap take out. It made me feel a little sick. I quickly walked up to the woman standing behind the desk and handed her my note. She took it and quickly scanned her eyes over it. She sat down in the office chair, and picked up a think binder beside the computer, shoving the note in and looking back up at me.

"Ok sweetie, it says you have very bad asthma, and that's why you can't participate in P.E." she said like I didn't know what I wrote "So I can put you in foreign language, but not art, too many chemicals". I nodded.

"Umm Spanish or Italian" I asked. She looked down at her computer screen. I saw her click a little icon and type in my name on what looked like a class role. She smiled at me and handed me a new piece of paper. Wow that was easier than I thought it would have been.

"And Ms. Cope" I'm going to try this dazzling thing. She looked at me puzzled "My mom needs my help unpacking our things. Can I leave early?" I lied so easily. I could even believe it. Ms. Cope looked shocked.

"Ummm" she looked around the office, looking for backup it looked like "Well since there is only one class left. I guess it wouldn't do much harm. But this is the only time I'm letting you do this" I smiled and nodded.

"Thank you" I walked out of the office quickly wanting to feel the cold outside air on my skin. Being in that room made me feel claustrophobic.

I jumped into my car without looking back. I thought that being at school would help me get my mind off of him, but it didn't. It didn't help at all. Everything I did led to a thought, that led to a thought, that led to a thought, that would sooner or latter end up on him. Maybe, I should go to the Volturi. What reason would they have at turning me down? There isn't anything special about me. I looked at my eyes quickly in the mirror, they were black as night. Great, I really hope nobody noticed. I pulled into my driveway a few minutes later, and saw something taped to my door. I wonder what that could be. After cutting the engine and grabbing my newly acquired books, I hoped up the stairs, and snatched the note off the door. It was typed.

**C.J. -**

**I know what you are.**

**-anonymous**

I froze up. I couldn't move. This couldn't be happening.

Next thing I know I'll be sitting in my home, and look out to see dozens of people with pitchforks and torches. It's not like they could actually hurt me, but I don't want to have to hurt any of them either.

Who could this be, and more importantly what they want? I don't have the time or the luck to find out.

I have to leave.

I ran inside, with the note tucked under my arm. This is aggravating. I just got settled in and someone thinks they can run me from my home. I'm not going down without a fight. Whoever this was, didn't want me to know who they were though. Maybe if I was lucky it would be a human, and I could just kill them. That thought disgusted me the minute it registered. I was not a monster, and I won't hurt anyone, unless I have to. I can settle this in a way, that doesn't have to involve me leaving too, hopefully. But until then I'm not staying here.

I quickly ran upstairs and threw my items from school onto the bed. I snatched up the letter and read it over and over until, it just became a blur.

_I know what you are…_

I shoved the letter into my jewelry box, and pulled out my ring, sliding it onto my left ring finger. I studied it, it sparkled so brightly it almost hurt to look at it. Ten small diamonds nestled into a golden plate, and a thin band wrapping smoothly around my finger. It had seemed like forever ago that he'd given it to me. Leaving this house, I would leave all of the memories it held. His scent still lingered in here…along with another one.

I stiffened. They were in my house.

Whoever it was, was not human that was for sure, but I couldn't tell what they were. The scent was so old. It was hour ago that they were here. I quickly ran down the stairs, searching through the house to see if I could find a fresher trail.

Nothing. Whoever it was, was very sneaky. And tricky. I ran out to my car quickly jumping in and cranking it. Whatever I was doing next didn't matter, right now I need to hunt.


	2. The Cullens

_**Again**_

_**I hate to beg**_

_**review or the rest of the story will stay in my head**_

_**:]**__**  
**_

**Chapter 2** **:**_** The Cullens**_

I threw down the bear carcass, I had finished, and sat down on the wet and dirty bracken of the forest floor. I didn't feel like moving just yet. I've had my filling, even thought it took a trip to the mountains to find the variety that would sustain for however long this crap was going to go on. I was really ready to just find out who this was. Now that's I've had time to think, I wasn't as terrified as when I first found out. No, now I'm just pissed that I let someone have that power over me. It freaked me out also to think that this person could ruin my life when I did nothing to anyone. I was just trying to live my life.

Maybe they knew me somehow through-

I stopped myself mid-sentence. No reason to get even more depressed when I'm already so low, and have so many things against me. Life really does suck. I pushed the ground throwing myself up to my feet, and quickly buried my last meal. I did feel kind of bad that I had to kill animals. When I was human I was all about animal protection, and never ate meat, but I figured it was better than killing humans to stay alive.

I opened the trunk of my car, just parked outside of the forest. My clothes looked horrible. I looked like I was mauled by a bear, drug through the mud, and fell from every tree in the forest. At least, my clothes looked like that. My skin was never torn, however my hair was slightly damaged, which only made me want to kill that bear ever more. So thank goodness I had spare clothes in the trunk. I didn't think I would get use to hunting. I've been doing it for nine years, and I always look so horrible after every single one.

After changing my clothes and taming my hair, I was back on the road. It was dark out now, but it didn't affect my driving, if anything it was a reason to go faster. I love driving at night. I was careful the whole way home about letting my thought go astray. I turned up the stereo and sang along with the songs I knew. I pulled into my driveway twenty minutes later. I walked up in the door and flipped on the light. Something felt strange. I felt really odd, like I was being watched. Something wasn't right. I quickly shut the door, and ran back to my car. I knew it wasn't rational for me to behave this way, but I had no idea who or _what_ was in my house. I could try to calm myself enough to go back in and face it, or I could leave. I chose the safest one.

I pulled out of the driveway so fast it nearly gave me whiplash.

I was flying down the road, when I remembered I have nowhere to go. I was so use to running to _him_ when I was scared. He always knew what to say to make me feel better no matter what. He's not here. So what do I do now? There was something in my house, I was terrified to even know what it was, and not exactly thrilled about having to face it again. I don't like Forks anymore. It seems everywhere I go someone is out to get me.

I was snatched out of my thoughts when I heard a loud bang on the top of my car.

Holy crazy Jews, there is someone on top of my car. It's official. I'm just not meant to live as a vampire. I stopped the car quickly hoping whoever it was would fly off. Nope, no luck.

I stepped out of the car, to face who was threatening me. I stopped when I didn't see anyone. Maybe I really am going crazy. I hate this. I'm so paranoid, and now someone is really out to get me. This is just too much for me to take. Before I knew it I was sobbing. Dry sobs of course, but it was strong enough to make me crumble to the ground.

It startled me when I felt two massive arm encircle me. I jumped up instinctively, and whoever it was stepped back away.

"WHY?!!" I screamed, before I could register my thoughts. I was drawn back when I saw the person's face, as he stepped closer to me. He had large golden eyes like mine, and massive muscles. His hair was as black as night, and his skin was just as pale as mine. He was a vampire. So a vampire was threatening me. And worse, one that thought just by trying to soothe me, it would make it all better. If that was even what he was trying to do. He stared at me confused.

"What are you talking about?" He demanded looking at me horrified.

"Why are you trying to scare me away. I've never done anything to you" I stopped to steady myself. I can't get angry, I have to remind myself that I can stop this without having to leave or fight "I just want to live my life, or at least what's left of it" He looked at me skeptically.

"I don't know what you're talking about" he said shrugging. Before he turned I saw something that looked like anguish in his eyes. This didn't look like someone who would want to hurt me, or run me away, but I did just meet him. I sighed heavily. I was going to give him a chance. Maybe he really didn't know anything that was going on. I stuck out my hand on a whim.

"I'm C.J." I said looking straight at him. He looked at me and smiled.

"I'm Emmett" he mumbled. That sounded like a pretty unusual name. Actually I never heard it before. He noticed my expression and chuckled.

"What?" he asked mid-laugh.

"I've just never heard that name before" I said quietly. If he really was nice I didn't want to ruin it by making fun of his name. It wasn't odd, it was just different. I liked it "It's different"

"Well" He said apparently still amused, but probably at what he was about to say "It's not everyday that you meet at girl named C.J." Now I see why he was laughing. I didn't care, I like my name.

"Well-" I started but was cut off.

"Come with me ok?" he stared at me intensely "I need to take you to Carlisle"

I had no clue who he even talking about and was about to protest, when I felt myself nod. Hopefully I didn't just get myself into something. Not like I really had a choice. If he really wanted me to go he could have made me. He was easily much stronger than I was. I hopped into the drivers seat and he just stood there.

"What are you doing?" I asked "Get in". He looked at me like I had lost it before he spoke. He pointed one finger towards himself.

"I know where it is" he paused to turn his finger towards me "You don't. So I drive". He smiled triumphantly. I glared at him as I made my way around the car to the passenger seat.

He drove extremely fast, faster than me even. I would have told him to slow down, but to protect my car. It wasn't built to exceed the numbers he was trying to reach.

"Emmett, seriously you are going to fry my engine. Cool it with the lead foot" he chuckled and I saw the MPH meter slowly move down.

Minutes later we pulled up in front of a huge house. It was gorgeous.

"This is were you live?" I squeaked. He laughed, but just nodded. I didn't feel very right. I just met this guy and I'm at his house. What if he really was crazy? What if he brought me here to kill me? He didn't seem like the violent type, but he sure was big enough to be. I cautiously stepped out of the car, as he opened my door. I walked behind him through the door, and noticed that there were more vampires piled around the living room. They all stared at me wide-eyed, and I noticed the strange girl from school among them. Did that make her a vampire too?

I couldn't seem to find my breath. I was so scared. Any chance I had surviving tonight is gone. Maybe if I run right now and get a good head start, I'll make it out alive tonight. One of them stood. He had bronze hair, and was by far the best looking in his family.

"We are not going to harm you C.J." He spoke softly. My eyes grew wide. How did he know my name? "So there is no need for a head start" he chuckled "And thank you". I rose my eyebrow. What the hell is going on?

"H-How do you know my name?" I stopped "And how did you know what I was uhh-" He cut me off.

"I'm Edward" he said, approaching me "And I can hear your every thought, I pulled your name from Emmett's head" So that explained the 'thank you' part. He heard what I said about him being more beautiful than the rest of his family.

Crap, I thought loudly. This is going to suck. I thought my head was the only place I could hide, guess I don't even have that.

Edward broke through my thoughts.

"C.J. who are you here with?" he asked looking me straight in the eyes. I could tell them am here alone, but that would make it too official. It would register in my mind, that I would never see him again, and I wasn't ready for that. I sighed in defeat. I just blew it. Edward heard all of that.

"Yes I did" He said answering my thoughts.

"You know that annoys people" I said glaring at him. I heard several voices

behind me saying things like 'you have no idea', 'yeah it really does', and 'just get use to it'.

"So are you going to tell us your story?" He asked.

"Why do you care?" I challenged. I knew I was behaving rude, but did he honestly expect me to just open up to him. I just met them. Just then a blonde male stood and walked over to the side of us. He looked more like one of those gorgeous movie stars that my mom use to be so in love with, than a family man.

"Carlisle" he snarled "That's not safe"

"It's the only way, Edward" the man named Carlisle said and went to take his seat back next to a beautiful woman, about twenty-five, too young to look like she had children, but I assumed she was the mother-figure of this family.

Edward looked back at me and spoke.

"If you are going to take up residence here we need to know your story" he paused, and I looked up to him confused "We have been here for a while, and you are welcome to stay with us". He looked like he was forcing the last words out. Did he really not want me here that bad? I half assumed him to respond, but he just shook his head, and shut his eyes.

So I guess I would tell them my story if it meant that much to them. Edward sighed and opened his eyes.

"Thank you" he whispered, and he lead me towards an empty couch on the far side of the room. Every eye in the room was on me. There were nine vampires waiting for me to begin, and I couldn't have been more nervous, had I been human. I could see out of the corner of my eye that Edward, sitting to my left was getting impatient. So without hesitating I just launched into my story.

"I was born July 27th in 1989. I lived in Portland, Oregon for most of my life, but when I was sixteen, me and my mom left my dad to go be with her parents, because she didn't believe they would live much longer and she wanted to be with them. Anyway, so we moved to Walla Walla. Se loved it, but I hated it. The weather was always so cold.

"One day at school was different from the others, mostly because we hd a new student. I quickly noticed he was different. He never ate, he never talked to anyone. I was intrigued. I wanted to learn more about him. So, he was surprised one day when I sat at his table, just on a whim. At first he was very angry and said that I didn't need any friends like him. Then we started talk, mostly because I was very persistent. He always said strange things that I couldn't keep up with, and he was relieved that I couldn't figure out what he was.

"Soon after we were inseparable. He was so amazing, everything about was just a lure to me. I couldn't keep myself away from him. It wasn't long until he started starring in my dreams. One day some of his kind were passing through. We didn't know until they showed up. He didn't know them at all, and they only stopped because they smelt me. I didn't know at the time what was going on, and was shocked that he was talking to them like they were so vile. Their eyes were deep red, and I was terrified. He fought them. There were only two, but he was strong. He won. I was hiding behind the couch, trying to block thee sounds. When the screeching stopped I just stood there in shock, because I still had no idea what had happened.

"He then explained to me what they were… and what he was. At first I was terrified. I told him to stay away from me. But as the days grew into weeks I felt a strong ache to just be with him. It was killing me. Everyday I had to fight the urge to touch him, to kiss him. And to see him all alone again hurt so bad. I finally gave in when I knew I could stay away any longer. He was very surprised, and I told him that I didn't care what he was, that I had already fallen in love with him" I stopped to clear my head. I didn't know if I could go on, it hurt so bad. The memories…..I was usually trying to forget were now coming full force to the surface, and digging a hole straight through me. I sucked in a deep breath, and looked up to see eight pairs of eyes looking sympathetically at me. Great, I seem pathetic. I lowered my gaze to the floor, and forced myself on.

"We lived like that for two years. He was by my side. Sneaking in at night, just to lay with me while I was asleep. He was relieved that he no longer had that secret over me, and we could be honest with each other. I knew he didn't age, and that people were going to start noticing. So the week after I turned eighteen, we left together. I didn't know what was going on. He told me that he wanted to have a life with me and I happily agreed, even if that meant changing me. He took me around the world. We went to cities, and countries I hadn't even heard of. He wanted me to experience it all, before he changed me. He thought my human memories were so much more important. And it did take some time to convince him that I wasn't going to change my mind once I was changed, and not love or want to be with him anymore. I was actually shocked he would even think that. He knew I loved him with everything" I stood up ,and started to pace to relax myself. I couldn't hold my steady composure for much longer, and I needed to go ahead and finish my story before I had a melt down.

Just then a girl stood, and walked over towards me. She had long chocolate brown hair, and was very beautiful.

"It's ok" she whispered hugging me tightly. She stepped back, and looked at a blonde boy sitting across the room "I know two people right now in this room, that know exactly how you feel. Oh and I'm Bella". I stepped back away. This family was being very nice to me. I was extremely grateful I ran into them and not some freaks.

"Thank you, Bella" I smiled genuinely at her. I sat back onto the couch, and was just about to pick up were I left off, when I caught a whiff of a very familiar smell. I recognized it just as a tall tan boy walked through the front door. The girl, Nessa shot up from the couch with a huge grin on her face.

"Jacob!" she squealed, like a little girl.

This was not safe. I remember that scent. He is not safe. I heard myself snarl before the words flew from my mouth.

"YOU KILLED JARED" I screamed, and lunged at the surprised boy, before anyone even know what had happened.

_**Review.....A mysterious vampire will show up at your school**_


	3. Power!

**Chapter 3**_ Power?!  
_

I was stopped abruptly when I slammed into what felt like a boulder. I looked up confused, Edward was standing in front of me. I keep forgetting his talent. He must have heard my thoughts and put two and two together, knowing what it was leading to. He grabbed my hand and pulled me from the floor.

"I'm sorry C.J. you can't attack him" he said it almost as if he wished he could say otherwise. I lifted my eyebrow questioning him. The look on his face told me that this discussion was over.

"Jakey, it's ok" Nessa comforted him, hugging him tightly.

I quickly took my eyes off of the murderer before I looked back at Edward. He motioned for me to sit, so I did.

"Now who is this Jared, that you think Jacob killed" he asked looking into my eyes. I looked away quickly. Jared….only the core of my being, the reason for my existence, the love of my life and the center of my world…but not anymore. Edward's expression grew pained. He quickly wrapped me in a hug. I threw my arms around him and sobbing dry tears. Life was so unfair, and it seemed like it was the end for me, but I had a feeling that this family would help me live through the worst of all pains. Edward pulled away and looked at me.

"We will definitely try our best" He whispered. To anyone passerby this conversation would have looked a little more than just a comforting, but I was comfortable. Edward felt somewhat of a shelter for me to harbor in.

"Edward, what's going on?" the blonde woman across the room asked. I looked over quickly. She was very beautiful much like the rest of her family. She looked like a supermodel. I was taken back when I realized I hadn't _really_ looked at anyone in the room.

"It's ok Rosalie" He confirmed her worries, but she looked at me skeptically, almost as if waiting for me to jump up and fly out of the room "Ok look put yourself in her shoes. What would you do if you lost Emmett?". Just as soon as those words slipped out of his mouth, her expression changed drastically. Her face fell and she looked like she was about to start crying. Emmett crossed the room in two steps, and grabbed her in his arms.

"It's ok Rose" he whispered in her ear, but still loud enough for us to hear "I'm right here, and I always will be". She sighed and hugged him. Edward looked back at me.

"So C.J." he resumed his steady attitude "why do you think Jacob killed Jared?" My expression, and total train of thought shifted to fury and I changed my position to face Jacob.

"I KNOW HE DID" I screamed, every face averted to me. Edward grabbed my arms, and brought them around behind me back, so to make sure I didn't repeat my earlier stunt. Jacob looked at me and smiled, like all of my pain an fury did nothing but amuse him. That made me so much angrier.

I could feel Edward's strong grasp on me tighten, and his arm wrap around my torso. I hadn't noticed how strong I was pulling, until I felt Edward shift, and grip me tighter. All I cared about at the moment was ripping that creature's neck out of his body.

"JASPER!" Edward screamed behind me "I'm not going to be able to hold her if she gets any angrier, do something". Why would he ask Jasper, the smaller blonde to help, when Emmett was easily the strongest. Suddenly I felt myself slowly calm down. So that must be some power of his. I guess if I wasn't momentarily distracted by the choice in help, it might not have worked. They are clever. I settled back down into the couch, and started to breathe heavily. I didn't need to breathe, but this seemed to be helping me get control over my mind, all the while Jasper was calming me down. I sighed and closed my eyes. They all knew I wasn't asleep, but they left me like that so I could pull myself together. When I opened my eyes they were all still sitting there, including Jacob. He noticed me looking around and turned his glare back on me. Bella noticed and hit him in the back of the head.

"Jacob you will not be rude to our guest" She said it so formally. I snickered, and everyone looked at me surprised. Jasper leaned over to the small girl with black pixie-like hair, and whispered something I distinctly heard as "Maybe she is loosing it". Edward stood, and looked down at me.

"We will finish the conversation about your…..erm….story" he managed to get the words out "But it wouldn't feel right if you didn't know the family, since you keep having thoughts about the fact". I looked down sheepishly, at my feet. Apparently he was keeping tabs on my thoughts. They went around the room and each one introduced themselves. I learned that the woman I thought to be the mother figure was indeed the mother, Esme, that the small pixie-girl was Alice, and she could see what was going to happen in the future, and what not. Also that the smell I had smelt earlier at school really was half-vampire/half-human.

"How?" I whispered.

"Well" He smiled "Bella and I, our story is similar to yours". What did that mean? he was still alive, and they were friends with wolves for crying out loud. Edward chuckled.

"No" he said mid-laugh "I mean we fell in love when she was human". Oh that made sense now. It really wasn't everyday when a vampire falls in love at all, much less with a human. And she had baby, with a vampire? I'd dig more into that on later, but right now I need to get on with this. I need to finish my story. Maybe then it would clarify that the monster sitting in this very room with me, is a murderer and they will let me kill him. Edward chuckled under his breath and shook his head.

"Just go on" he motioned with his hand. I slumped back into the couch and started were I left off.

"On my nineteenth birthday he brought me back here to Washington, so I could say goodbye to my family. Not in those exact words, but one last visit with them before he took me away. He gave me a week with them which I was very grateful for, but I hated that he left me. When he came back to pick me up he…he..proposed" I held out my hand for them to see, with the ring still planted on my left hand. There were a number of gasps around the room, but I just kept going "He wanted to do it in front of my family. I was in a state of shock, and he to slap myself to make sure I wasn't imagining this. When I realized that he was real, and serious I quickly agreed. My mother wasn't too pleased, but I was just relieved that it was one conversation out of the way. I was dreading telling my dad. But then he told me that when I was here spending time with my mother, he had gone to Oregon just to get my father's permission. He was very skeptical about it at first, but something about Jared made him agree

"I let my mother plan the wedding. She went all out. I didn't want something that huge, but I was just relieved that she had finally come around, and started calling Jared 'son', and treating him like part of the family. The day of our wedding was the happiest day of my life. I still remember the music that was played, and I cried like a baby. For our honeymoon we went to a beautiful cabin deep in the forest, I later learned he had built. It had everything we needed. He changed me that night. It was the most painful thing I remember ever happening to me. I held in my screams as best as I could because I knew it was hurting him, but I wasn't strong enough to keep from crying out. When I woke, I was a different person. My senses were heightened, and I felt so powerful. My eyes were bright red, which confused me. He told me that it was my own blood still inside me and that once I started hunting animals, in a about a year it would be the same as his. I was so happy with him. He was the prince from all of my dreams just with a little more twist. The hardest thing was convincing my parents I was dead. The story the police told them was that we were mauled by bears, while hiking. They had a funeral, but the caskets were closed, so nobody noticed that they were empty. We moved to Everett into this beautiful house. I loved that house so much. We had waited two years after my change for me to come out in public. We lived there for a while, ever\n enrolling in school. But….one day" I stopped short. Edward motioned for me to continue.

One day, we went hunting, and we came upon these massive beasts. Some that just so happen to smell like your little friend. He thought that they wouldn't harm us because we were different. He knew what they were, but I didn't. Werewolves. He told me to just go. I told him I wasn't leaving him, and he said that they might not be safe, and he just want to make sure. Just then one growled, and the others took lead, and started too. One of them jumped out at me, and Jared grabbed him throwing him into a tree knocking him out cold. The others quickly took defense. We turned and ran. I just kept running until I saw the familiar path of our home, and he came behind me. We had lost them, luckily. Jared said that it wasn't safe for me to be there any longer, and that we were to move immediately. It annoyed me how he always did that though. He was in danger also, but all he cared was that I was threatened. We went far away, but not so far that they couldn't find us apparently.

"He bought us this beautiful house in Forks. I was so content living here with him. It was great. I didn't go to school, but I was going to start school in a few weeks. He wasn't pleased with the idea of me going without him, but he had taken a job. We went out one Saturday night. He had arranged this kind of picnic minus the food. He took me out into the middle of the forest, and we danced. He was so graceful, and perfect. He had everything, the candles, the music, even a blanket. We were dressed for a special occasion, me in the only little black cocktail dress I owned and he was in what he called his nice attire. We stopped suddenly when we heard a sound. It was coming from within the trees. They had hunted us down all the way to Forks. I was shocked, and Jared turned immediately angry, I assumed because they had ruined our special evening. He grabbed my arm and threw me behind him, when the biggest one growled. I told him that we needed to just run, but he was too furious to hear me. We were outnumbered, and he turned to me and told me to run. I again. Told him I was not leaving him.

"he finally gave in and we ran together. I didn't hear him, but I assumed he was behind me like last time. I ran for several minutes, and stopped to wit for either him to show up or the beasts, and that's when I heard it. The worst sound I've ever heard in my entire life. My Jared scream out in pain, and the sound of screeching metal. I ran back, and found our picnic site trashed, and no Jared. I searched through the forest all week, hoping I would find him instead of running back into those things again. But nothing. I called for him, and he never came. I knew they had killed him. He never did anything to anybody. He was always so …..so perfect.

"I went home, and stayed there. I didn't want to move. I hated life, and everyone in it. I hated any life that I had to live without Jared. I soon began forcefully pulling myself out of my depression, knowing that he wouldn't want me to live my life this way. I wasn't happy anymore. Nothing made me smile. I was like a lifeless body just floating around. When school came around I didn't feel like going, but finally convinced myself it would be healthier to get out, and think about other things.

"But-" Edward cut me off. I averted my eyes from the ground to him. His expression looked overly pained. I felt so bad that I was throwing all of my depressing life story on them.

"If you are going to feel bad" he whispered "Feel bad for Jasper. He just went through every emotion you just went through" I looked up at Jasper. His eyes were closed, ad he was shaking. Alice was by his side trying to comfort him, for pain that wasn't even his own.

"I'm so sorry Jasper" I whispered, but I knew he heard me. Jasper opened his eyes slowly and looked at me.

"how can anyone live through so much?" Jasper asked, shocked. Everyone in the room looked at me. I suddenly felt extremely self-conscious. Edward shook his head. I sighed and looked down. I missed Jared so much, but there wasn't anything I could do. But I have these people, this wonderful family, who offered to take me in, when I had nobody. I love them so much already for that. I sighed in relief at the thought. My new family.

I felt a wave of comfort sweep over me.

Edward averted his focus to Carlisle.

"So Carlisle" he paused to look back at me briefly "What do you want to do?"

"Edward the only thing I see as a problem" he sighed "is that we need to go speak to the pack about this". Jacob shot up.

"You mean to tell me that if the pack even did kill him" he yelled "that you're going to blame them for doing their job". Everyone looked at him shocked. Maybe they were finally seeing the monster come out in him.

"Jacob" Carlisle seemed to be trying to prevent the inevitable from happening

"It's plain and simple. Did they or did they not kill an innocent vampire?" He spoke slowly

Jacob looked straight at me.

"No" Jacob smiled.

"YOU'RE A LIAR!" I screamed. Edward grabbed me, but it was of no use. I wasn't trying to get to him. I buried my face in Edward's shirt, and heavy sobs shook my entire body. He let go and wrapped his arms around me. I could tell that me and him were going to be close. Best friends, like brother and sister. I was so emotional today from letting out everything I had bottled up inside of me for months out. I was extremely grateful that Edward didn't seem to mind being my shoulder to cry on.

"How do we know _she_ isn't lying" Jacob sneered. I jerked my head up ready to defend myself, but was shocked that Jasper beat me to it.

"the greatest actor in the world could not have _faked_ that level and intensity of pain" He practically shouted. I was extremely grateful I had one on my side angry at the mongrel. He has no right to call me a liar. I don't even have the imagination to come up with something off the top of my head. Part of me actually wished I was lying, but I couldn't bring myself to regret meeting him, and loving him. Suddenly Edward shot a confused look at me. Did I think of something strange? I sifted through my previous thoughts I had, but didn't find anything that would make him look at me so strangely.

"Do you have a talent?" he asked suddenly. I shook my head.

"No I don't" I sighed. I wished I had a talent. It would make being a vampire a little more interesting. He looked at Carlisle.

"Carlisle, I can't hear her" He said shocked. Every face turned shocked including my own. Carlisle eyed me skeptically.

"I wonder why that is" Carlisle murmured. He turned back to Jacob "You should leave, and I will be speaking to Sam Uley very soon" Jacob glared at me and stomped out the door. Nessa rose in defense.

"Grandpa, Jacob isn't even in the pack anymore" she groaned. Just like a teenager "It isn't his fault".

"That may be true Nessa" He spoke softly to her "But we need to know the details in who it was. And you need to go to bed". She nodded and sulked up the stairs. I suppose I shouldn't be surprised that she can sleep. I've never heard of anything like her, so who am I to question what she can and can't do,,,even if it is different. But I couldn't hide the questioning look on my face.

"She _is _part human" Edward spoke beside me "So she is quite different" He averted his eyes to look at Carlisle. "It was only for a few minutes, she has to have som kind of power". So he did hear what I was thinking about Carlisle looked around pondering for a moment. Then the voices came in. I screamed and grasped the sides of my head. What the hell was going on? I felt Edward grab me. After a few seconds of being shaken, I finally opened my eyes. Everyone was standing around me. Some staring at me like I had lost my mind, some looks were scared, others were concerned. I could hear them, but nobody was speaking.

'_What the hell is going on?'_

'_I think she has lost it"_

'_Maybe her power is screaming, cause that's gonna kill my hearing for while'_

'_I really hope she's ok'_ then they stopped.

I looked around. Well I sure felt like and idiot, but in my defense I was taken by surprise. It's not everyday you hear voices in your head, at least not for me. They really think I'm psycho. That's just wonderful, I thought to myself.

I'm gonna be kicked out of this house.

"No we don't think you are psycho" It was Edward that finally broke the intense silence. He switched his focus on Carlisle.

"She's used both Bella's talent, and yours too Edward" Carlisle said "So it seems she has an unusual power, but definitely a power". Everyone turned to Carlisle.

"Wait" Bella pointed to herself "She used my power?" Carlisle nodded. I shot a confused glance at Bella.

"I'm a shield" She explained "My mind is the only one that Edward can't hear" she paused "Unless I want him to". Wait what? I had heard of some pretty strange powers, like Jane's when jared explained all of that to me, but…

"I have a power?" I asked looking back at Carlisle He looked at me intensly.

"It would seem so" He raised his hand to place on his head "He he….ummm have a power?" Apparently they were trying to spare my emotional state by not mentioning his name. I wouldn't tell them that it hurt all the same. I shook my head. He had never told me of a power. If he did have one he would have told me. Wouldn't he

"Wait, Carlisle, Bella and I were the only ones to touch her" he paused to look back at me "could that have anything to do with it?" Carlisle nodded.

"That could indeed be her power" They all snatched their heads out of focus on Carlisle, to look back at me. God I freaking hate attention.

"She's an absorber" Edward said mostly to himself. Carlisle nodded. An absorber? Did that mean I I used other's powers, like a sponge or something? That's creepy.

"It would seem so" Edward said, answering my thoughts.

_Annoying Edward_, I thought staring straight at him. He smiled. I don't think I will ever get use to his power. It's so amazingly annoying. Once I got control over whatever power I had, I'm going to shield my mind. Hopefully Bella won't mind me borrowing her power. Edward glared at me.

"She won't, but I will" Ha he heard that didn't he.

"If it's the only way to keep you out of my head then, I'm doing it" I switched my focus to Bella "You wouldn't mind would you? If I used your power to keep Edward out of my head?" They all burst out laughing, all except one. One bitter little Edward. He was still glaring. It was apparent the he didn't want to be pushed out of my head. Too bad.

"Of course not" Edward turned his glare to her, she took immediate offence to that.

"Edward Anthony Masen Cullen, you do not need to be in everybody's head". thank you Bella. They were all still amused by the look still set in Edward's features. This is hilarious. Edward hung his head.

"Sorry Bella" he mumbled "It's just so annoying, It makes me feel uncomfortable, to not know what _you_ think as it is". So that was his problem.

"Don't worry so soon, Edward" I comforted him "It's going to be a while before I can control me newly found 'power' anyway". It worked, he smiled. This is going to be an interesting family to live with. Edward stood up, and turned his eyes to me.

"Come on, I'll drive you home" Wait what? I thought they wanted me here? It's not like I needed to go home. Edward laughed.

"Of course we still want you here" he said it almost as if my thoughts were utterly insane "I just thought you might want your books, if you are going to school with Nessa tomorrow". Oh it made sense now. I had completely forgotten about school. I should probably get my clothes too. I wasn't quite ready to move out of my house yet, but I was willing to spend some time away, besides it is what I was looking for. That's when it all came back. I had been so caught up in everything going on I completely forgot the thing in my home. The note. I quickly became terrified. Jasper was by my side in an instant trying to calm me down.

"Edward what was she thinking about?" Jasper asked.

"There was something in…..her house" he said it almost as if it was too insane to believe, but his voice kicked up a notch. Bella jumped up.

"You mean something not like us?" she asked me. I still have no idea what it could be. I nodded.

"Don't worry C.J. we will come with you" she said grabbing my hand "Nothing is going to happen. You are part of our family now. We got your back". I smiled.

"Thanks guys" This might not be as hard as I thought it was. Just then Edward stiffened. He looked quickly to Alice. Alice looked scared stiff. What the hell is going on? What did she see that was so terrifying? Bella yanked on Edward's arm, and forced him to look at her.

"Edward, what did Alice see?" she asked, like she didn't even want to know the answer. I don't think I really wanted to know either.

The whole room, including me went into shock at the sound of one word.

"Wolves" he whispered.


	4. No limit

_**Chapter 4**__No Limits_

Nessa cam running down the stairs at a super-human pace.

"I know you aren't talking about Jacob again" she groaned. We all broke out of our stiff expressions to notice her standing at the foot of the stairs, with her small arms crossed across her chest.

"No, this pack was…" Alice finally spoke "was…different". Rosalie grew furious.

"You mean to tell me that there are more wolves?" she nearly screamed. Alice nodded meekly. What did she mean 'different'? Weren't all werewolves the same? And while we are on the subject…how many freaking wolves are there?

"We honestly had no clue that there were any….outside of the pack in La Push" Edward's voice was toneless. Like he was waiting for the worst to come. For those beasts to tear through the door, and kill us all were we stand. Just because of me. _I_ am the one putting this family in danger. I need to leave. It's only hope that if they do get to me first, that they will leave this family alone. Edward grabbed my arm. Why is he stopping me? Didn't he even know the dangers I just brought down onto him, and his family?

"You aren't going anywhere" he forced through his teeth.

"The hell she isn't" Rosalie hissed "Edward you have put our family through enough danger in one lifetime. Let her go" Edward shot a glare at her.

"She's right Edward" I whispered "I can take care of myself, and I don't want any of you to get hurt, defending me". If it's me they want to bad, then that's what I'll give them, but I won't go down without a fight. Edward slung me over his shoulder and walked back over to the other side of the room, throwing me on the couch.

"You. Stay. Here" He said it slowly, but the fierceness in his words was deep and evident.

"Edward, I-"

"NO" He screamed cutting me off. I backed up into the couch. Bella stared shocked at him. Apparently this wasn't Edward's usual behavior. He sat down beside me, and I scooted farther to the opposite side of the couch. I hated to admit it, but he was scaring the crap out of me. Bella came over to my other side and sat on the arm of the couch. She place one hand on my arm, and I looked up to her. She was apparently the comforter for all intent and purposes. She was trying to make all of these new things to me, not freak me out, but I didn't think she could stop them entirely.

"Edward is just stressed" she explained "He feels very protective over his family, and you are now a part of it' I nodded.

"I can understand….I guess" I mumbled "But what are we going to do about the wolves?". Rosalie jumped up from beside Emmett.

"We?!" she nearly screamed "You _can not _and _will not_ put my family in danger". Edward shot a dark look.

"C.J. is now a part of this family, and we will keep her safe" he hissed. I was taken back in complete shock. I had never heard anyone stand up for me like that. Well except for…

"C.J. you don't understand" Edward looked from his folded hand back to my face. "Your story is so much like Bella's that I…Everytime I look at you I see someone else's Bella. I see what kind of pain I would have gone through…I see so much of her in you" Oh wow.

I never expected that. That I was to Jared, what Bella was to him. He understood that much about us, by just hearing my story. Bella walked around to couch and placed herself in his lap.

"Edward you are such a softy sometimes" she whispered "But I love that". He smiled and wrapped his arms around her. The amount of love I could feel radiating from them made me feel uncomfortable. It saddened me that I would never have that thought again. I would never have love again.

"Edward. Bella." Jasper pulled them out of their 'moment'. They looked up confused, and Edward slipped Bella out of his lap to sit next to him. Jasper was felling how it saddened me to watch that intensity of love. I gave him a grateful glance and he nodded. I jumped up from the couch, and turned to face Edward.

"Look I need to go get my things" I paused to pick out the right words "If you are going to want me to stay here, then I need some clothes, and my books". He nodded and stood.

"Where are your books?" He asked I shot him a glare. What did he think he was up to? Was he trying to keep me here instead of letting me come, and get my stuff myself? Ha. No. I'm coming.

"On my bed….but you don't know what clothes to get" I said satisfied. He had to let me come then. I looked at him, but expression didn't change.

"Emmett and I will go and get your books" he stopped and pointed to Alice "Alice will be more than happy to make you look stunning for school". Oh he is good. Very good.

Alice squealed, jumping up and down, clapping her hands. Bella leaned over towards me.

"She loves doing this kind of thing if you can't tell" she whispered so low nobody could have heard it, but us.

"Yay this is going to be so much fun" Alice squealed. I sunk back into the couch, covering my face with my hands. This is going to be a nightmare. I really hope she doesn't alter my appearance that much. She printed over to the couch and grabbed my arm.

"Come on" she whined.

"Alice, school is in the morning" I moaned looking up at her cheery face.

"If you haven't noticed, silly, it is the morning" I noticed that I hadn't even realized how early it was. I looked at the clock in the back of the room, it was four o'clock in the morning. The sun wasn't even up yet. How long was this makeover gonna last. I switched my focus to see Edward and Emmett pulling out of the driveway in my Mercedes. So I was beaten. I sighed and gave myself over to Alice. She dragged me upstairs, and threw outfit after outfit at me trying to get me to pick one. I honestly didn't care what I wore. I was mostly concerned she would force me into some cheery bright clothes that I would have never worn. I finally picked one that we both agreed on, when I heard my car pull back into the driveway. It was my favorite colors. It wasn't too cheery, but on the border line. However compared to the other outfits, this was the best I was gonna get away with.

"Alice no. Anything _but pink_ please" I moaned. She was dangling a pair of strappy heel in front of my face. They had the colors of my outfit in them, but also pick. Pink is just too happy for me.

"You will wear these shoes, because they are the only pair I have to match that outfit" I couldn't exactly tell if the bitterness in her voice was to do with the fact that it was the only pair of shoes she had for that outfit, or that I wanted to mix colors. She was a vicious little thing. I grabbed the shoes and slid them on.

"There Alice are you happy now?" I asked.

"Very" she beamed "Now sit still". She was moving on to the make-up part. She didn't do much to my intense relief, but enough to make me feel different. She had me in a pair of worn-out looking jeans, she called them distressed (whatever) they were True Religion, and apparently I was taking it too extreme that I was in a three-hundred dollar pair of jeans.

"THERE H-HOW MUCHH?!" Alice backed away, and gave me a confused stare.

"C.J. if you haven't noticed I dress my family in _only_ the best" she replied like this was nothing but a spare pair of jeans sitting in the back of her closet. If my parents had even had the money to buy me a pair of jeans worth this much I would have locked them in an iron vault, I sighed and started to unbutton them. Alice grabbed my hand and zipped them back up.

"Alice" I groaned "I can't wear these. What would happen if I ruin them, and with my luck I can almost guarantee that I will". She laughed at my apparent naïveness.

"You will wear these jeans" she said, as if she thought that would end my discomfort. I sighed. At least I liked the top. It was a canary yellow v-neck halter top, with a lime green camisole underneath. I hated to admit it, but I looked good. It brought out the gold tints in my eyes. But the shoes. Oh god those shoes. I wish I could rip them up and burn them.

Alice was extremely happy with her final piece. She grabbed my hand, and dragged me down the stairs.

"I would like you to meet the new and _improved_ C.J." Nobody was in the living room, but Bella. As soon as she hopped up the rest of the family came piling in. There were shocked expressions, and gasps. I didn't think I looked that different.

"Wow C.J. you look _HOTT_" I heard Emmett. Rosalie slapped the back of his head, then turned to me, and surprisingly smiled.

""You look great C.J." Rosalie said "Almost as good as me". I couldn't help but laugh at that.

"Thanks" I smiled. This is going to be quite an amusing day at school. I saw Edward in the back laugh and nod.

Edward drove me and Nessa to school. We talked, surprisingly became good friends really fast. At least I have one friend today. She was kind, and very smart. She showed me her power. It was very emotional for me. She showed me myself, last night, during my breakdown. I looked horrible. My guilt for putting Jasper through that too, tripled. I could comprehend every emotion that passed through my face. Sorrow, anger, pain, and the most powerful was loss.

"Nessa" Edward called from the front seat "I don't think she really needs to see that". Nessa didn't understand, but turned and saw the twisted expression on my face. Her face twisted in horror.

"C.J. I'm so sorry" she groaned, grabbing me in a hug. I hugged her back, when she turned off the vision.

"I was just trying to show you my power" she explained "I honestly wasn't thinking"

"It's ok Nessa"

We pulled up to the school, only minutes after leaving the house. I was so nervous, as to how people were going to react to my new look. Nessa grabbed my hand and pulled me out of the car. I heard the Volvo speed off behind me, and several gasps. They were all very surprised by my new look, and it clearly showed in every single face. Their stares and glares were enough to make me want to go climb under a rock and never come out. The small girl, I remembered from yesterday, as Karen came running toward us. Her eyes widened when she took in my new appearance.

"Oh" she said stopping in front of us "I see you are already friends". I smiled. Hopefully she wouldn't mention my clothes. Nessa laughed.

"Yeah" she said "we are a lot alike". Karen seemed appeased that we were friends.

"So C.J. what's with the new look?" Karen asked eyeing my clothes. I knew this was coming. I pulled at the hem of Alice's shirt, suddenly feeling uncomfortable. I didn't need to give her a full explanation so I only gave her one word.

"Makeover" I mumbled. They both laughed at me.

"Ah, so you've met Alice" I shot my head up. She knew Alice? Nessa saw the confusion on my face.

"Karen, has met my family, yes" she sighed "She was my only friend. Everyone else thinks I'm odd". Ha yeah if they only knew how odd we really were.

I slung my purse over my shoulder and fled the little get together, because I was about to be late to class. When I walked in the room everyone, and even the teacher did double takes. If I could have, I definitely would have blushed. My Latiner called me up to his desk and gave me a book list, and a literature book. I accidentally brushed my hand against, and he jumped back at the temperature of my skin. He grabbed his hand and shook it violently, like I had just pour acid on him. I new my skin was cold to humans, but he was just overreacting. I went back to my desk to study this list. It had all the basics. Emily Bronte, Shakespeare, and Jane Austen I knew immediately. The others I was sure Bella would have, and lend to me.

"You look different" It was the boy next to me, Zack. Good maybe he would stop trying to hit on me.

"I don't see that as a bad thing" I whispered.

"Oh it isn't" Dang. Hopes smashed. I grabbed um my list and went over it again trying to block out his attempts to get my attention. Mr. Latiner thankfully called the class to attention at that time. I pretended to be listening intently on what he was saying, to keep Zack from trying to talk to me. When the bell finally rang, I grabbed my books. I thought with you know me all super fast I would get out of there before he cornered me. Nope.

He was standing right in front of me when I sat back up from getting my books from the ground.

AHHHH HELP ME!

I noticed the twisted expression on his face as anxiety. Great. Alice is going to get it when I get back to the house.

"I was just wondering if maybe…your...free this weekend" He mumbled.

"Sorry I'm married" he looked confused. I realized my mistake.

I could have pulled something like no I'm seeing someone, or I have plans, but no. Stupid, stupid me. I tell him the truth. Well maybe he'll think I'm crazy and leave me alone.

"I-I mean" I came up with the best cover story I could think of "I'm seeing someone….I'm going to be…married…soon". he looked at me skeptically, like I was lying. But I kinda was, so I guess I shouldn't be too offended. I've never been a good liar.

"To who?" The only think I could think was 'wow nosy much?'. I sighed. Here it goes.

"Ok. I'm not, but I really do have plans this weekend….I just….I'm not stable enough right now to be in a relationship" he understood that.

"Just get out of a bad one?" he asked sympathetically. If only he knew how _great_ that relationship was. I squeezed my eyes shut, and sucked in a deep breath.

"Something like that" I whispered "I have to go". I ran out of the classroom not caring what people saw. If I could cry I would have looked as horrible as I felt. Nessa was standing outside of the classroom, waiting for me. When she saw the mess I was becoming she grabbed me and wrapped me in a hug.

"Do you want me to call my dad?" she whispered. There really wasn't anywhere I wanted to be, but there. I nodded and she pulled me around to side of the building. She grabbed out her phone, hit a button, and put it to her ear.

"Hey Dad" she turned her voice all sugary "I don't think that C.J. is going to make it through the rest of the-….yes, I know that….But, you don't see what a mess she is right now….If she could she would be…..I'm not sure what was said……she looks like she did last night….Ok I'll see you…Love you too Daddy" She snapped the phone shut, and slipped it back in to her purse.

"It's all going to be ok C.J. " She gripped my shoulders as if trying to beat that into me. I nodded. How bad did I look? I didn't think I was that obvious when it came to talking about something uncomfortable. She slumped down into the grass and patted the spot next to her. I sat down and she leaned her head on my shoulder. She felt so warm, sometimes it's hard to believe she isn't human. She startled me when she sat up suddenly and snatched her phone back out of her bag. She punched in a number and put it to her ear. She looked…almost nervous.

"Hey Jake" Now I see why. "Will you come over later?"….No they aren't mad at you" I was seriously thinking of listening in, but I knew if it was of any importance Nessa would tell me. Just because I have issues with him didn't mean everybody else had to.

"JACOB BLACK!" I never heard her scream like that "You will not talk about my family like that…..All of the Cullens are my family…..I was born into it, do you think I really-…..fine…..No Jacob, I'm not…..I just wanted to tell you that-….. Ok stop interrupting me…..I wanted to tell you that there are more….well of you….that's not funny, you know what I mean….There are more wolves….I was going to tell you later, but you said you weren't coming over……No. _C.J._ isn't leaving….ok I'll see you tonight…..I still love you too". She chuckled snapping her phone shut.

"I suppose should have waited to tell him, but he was being so stubborn" she sighed, and leaned back into the grass. Minutes later we heard the Volvo pull up into the street. Edward jumped out and ran to us. Eager much? Nessa hopped up and met him half way with a hug. This is a very hugging family. They walked over to were I sat.

"C.J. what happened?" he asked sounding some-what of an overly-obsessed worried parent. I stood up to let him see that I am perfectly fine.

"This isn't about C.J. but umm dad" he turned to face her "Jake said that he had no idea there were …others. He's coming over tonight, and we are going to take him to her house to see if he recognizes any scent". He nodded and I felt relief sweep over me. That's what they were talking about on the phone…now it made sense.

"I'm perfectly fine Edward I just got a little emotional when this guy asked me out and I had to come up with a cover off the top of my head" he understood, but the look on Nessa's face said she didn't.

"I couldn't exactly tell him I'm a widow, Nessa" I could feel the pained expression wipe over my face. I clutched my left shoulder with my right arm, to make sure that a chunk of me really hadn't been vacuumed out, like it felt. Edward grabbed my arm and hoisted me toward the car.

"C.J. you are in no condition to be in school" he said as he sat in the driver's seat. Nessa hopped in the back and let me have the front. We didn't talk the whole way home. I just sat and counted the trees as they went by. Anything that would distract me from previously. When we got the house, I felt strange….almost if we were being watched.

"C.J. when was the last time you hunted?" Edward asked looking directly at me. Why was he asking such strange questions? I hunted just yesterday….what could make him look at me like that?

"Umm a few hours before I ran into Emmett" I answered. He looked around confused. Nessa twisted to look at what was making her dad act so strangely. And jumped back.

"C.J. why are your eyes black?" Nessa asked horrified. I flipped down the passenger mirror above me, and sure enough my eyes were pitch black. But why? I wasn't thirsty at all. I just hunted yesterday. What the hell is going on with me?

"I'm not sure" Edward answered my thoughts….again. I flung open the door of the Volvo, and hopped out. Nessa was just two strides behind me when I ran in the house. Carlisle was standing at the edge of the stairs, like he knew what was coming. I strode up next to him.

"Carlisle why are my eyes so dark?" I asked him. He smiled liked I was being silly to ask him this question.

"You're thirsty dear" he said slowly.

"No. Carlisle I hunted yesterday" the same confused expression that Edward had, came over Carlisle's face too. He gripped the banister so tightly it broke into splinters at his fingers. Esme ran in the living room, her tiny face twisted in anguish.

"Not my banister…Carlisle…what's wrong with you? You've never done anything like this". Esme ran to my side and stared at her distant husband.

She twisted her head to look at me, to try to find the problem, and gasped.

"Sweetheart you need to hunt" she said grabbing my arm "..NOW". I shook my arm out of her grasp.

"I'm honestly not thirsty at all Esme" she looked confused. She turned and walked up the stairs and I heard a door shut softly. Edward came in just then and twisted me around quickly to face him.

"Did you touch _any_ human at all today?" he asked, his voice kicking up a notch. I thought back to today. The only class I had actually gone to was literature. I didn't remember touching anyone. But I did. It came back to me. When I accidentally brushed against the teacher and he freaked out like that. Edward nodded listening to my thoughts.

"C.J. I think your power maybe a little more strange than we all thought" Both of their heads snatched up in unison, and Carlisle looked confused,

"What do you mean Edward?" Carlisle asked.

"I mean it seems her power has no limits" I drew in ragged breath, and asked what was currently going through my head.

"My body is trying to develop the characteristics of a human?".

He let out a deep 'whoosh' and looked as if he really didn't want to answer the question. How could he keep something like this from me?

_Edward! I know you can hear me. Tell me right now. AM I RIGHT?!_

He nodded.


	5. Déjà vu

_**Chapter 5**__ Déjà vu_

I twisted around on my heel, and took off out the door. I didn't really care where I was going, so I would just run. This is insane. Can't anything about my life be normal? Really? I've never heard of anything like this before, in my life. I just find out that I'm basically the biggest freak of the vampire world….Not too fun.

I half assumed I would hear Edward behind me by now, but was relieved that he understood, and gave me the space I needed. Feeling the wind whip around my face made me feel free. Like I really didn't have a problem in the world, but I couldn't run forever. I stopped in front of a huge oak tree. It was easily eighty feet. I scaled it, and sat there on a branch. I looked down over the forest and realized that I had no earthly clue where I was. If I didn't come back soon they would start searching for me, that much I was sure of. But I was hoping also that I didn't have to face them. What kind of freak they must think I am. I punch the tree harder than I thought the impact would be. So it surprised me when I heard a crack, and the tree start to bow over. I quickly hopped to the tree to my left, and watched the massive tree hit the ground. I snapped my head back when I heard a snap behind me. Edward was sitting on the branch right behind me. I never even heard him coming.

"I came only to make sure you didn't run into any trouble" he explained hopping to the branch next to my own. Edward was always so worried about me. He was such a selfless person, always putting his family before himself. I sighed and leaned back against the tree trunk.

"How did you know where I would be?" I asked him closing my eyes. It sounded like he moved, but I didn't bother opening my eyes to see.

"I usually scale trees too when I'm upset" he chuckled.

"I'm sorry for running away like that" I whispered. I felt him grab my arm, and opened my eyes to see him staring at me.

"Don't be ridiculous. You just found out something that would have easily sent any of the others over the edge".

"Is it really that bad?" I mumbled looking down at me hands. My vile evil hands. If I couldn't touch I never would have been in this mess. Maybe I should just cut them off…

"You are to do no such thing" I snatched my gaze away from my hands. Edward was looking scornfully at me. Stupid, mind-reader.

"Do we have to go home now?"

"No…"

"Good. I don't think I'm ready to face your family just yet".

"C.J. they do not think bitter of you just because you were freaked out. It's a rational response". Was he honestly trying to convince me that I'm not a freak? I knew they were going to be angry with the way I just tore off like that. He hopped up, his feet landing perfectly on the branch. He didn't even lose balance. Typical.

"But since we are pretty far out…we don't need to stay long" He said grabbing my hand and standing me up.

"Speaking of which…where exactly are we?" I shifted my body to get a better view of the forest around me. I looked up to see Edward looking at me skeptically. Why wouldn't he want to tell me where we are?

"Edward where are we?" Maybe he just didn't know…? He sighed.

"We are in Walla Walla" he said, I stiffened. My instincts had brought me back here? My mom is just a few miles away…

"No. You know you can't" Edward broke through my thoughts.

"I know Edward. I just…I guess I just wish I could see her again" He understood. He grabbed my arm, and we jumped from the branch landing gracefully on the forest floor. I was expecting him to head in the direction of home, but he didn't.

"Edward…what's going on?" I asked him. Really what was his deal today. I was starting to wish I could read his mind. He smiled.

"I'm being stupid letting you do this…but we can't be seen by her, no matter what. Got it?" I hopped up and down squealing. I can't believe he was actually going to let me see my mom, after all these years. I grabbed him in a hug.

"AHHHH Edward you are the best" He laughed.

"So I've been told" he said unleashing me.

"I have to hunt first" I said pointing to my eyes. He nodded. We ran through the forest until we ran into a pack of mule. Odd. I leapt on the back of one, devouring it instinctively. I couldn't possibly do it if I thought about what I was doing. I stood and wiped off the dead leaves. Edward chuckled, and grabbed my face to look him in the eyes.

"Much better" I slapped his hand away, and looked down.

"Ok let's go"

He pointed the way, and we turned, taking off towards the city.

The city was just the way I remembered it. Like it hadn't changed a bit, in all the years. It was kind of relieving.

"I have my phone, just in case we get recognized. Well incase you get recognized" Edward said. I nodded, and we walked down the sidewalks through the neighborhood. I could find my way to my mother with a blindfold on. Her house was just one block away, and I started getting nervous, I could feel my stomach dropping with every step I took. Edward stopped.

"Are you going to be ok?" he asked. I nodded. I started to walk on, but he grabbed my arm, and held up one finger for me to give him a second. He snatched out his phone, and punched a number. He whipped it to his ear as soon as the person picked up.

"Carlisle" he stuttered. Since when did he stutter? "We are in Walla Walla……I know that this is where her mother is……we aren't going to be long…….just come with Bella…….ok bring your Mercedes". he hit the end button and slid it back into his pocket.

"I just wanted him to bring the car….It's faster than running" he explained. I nodded. That made sense. I guess it was better than running all the way home. We walked at a human's pace. Not so much to not stand out, as to build up my courage. I didn't think I would be this nervous, but I haven't seen my mom in so many years. I saw the house come up into plain sight, and gasped. It was exactly the same. The little old brick house, and the little yellow porch swing my grandpa loved so much. I clutched at Edward's arm. He pulled me forward. I was just going to look through the window anyway, it's not like I have to face my mother again. He pulled me into the thick shrubs that were just outside the family room window. They were big enough to block our images from the road, and passers. I looked in the window. It was amazing how much older my mother looked. She looked like she was in her eighty's instead of her fifty's. But in her defense she did lose her only child, after that only child got married. God, I feel horrible. She was sitting on the couch, with a blanket wrapped tightly around her. She looked like she hadn't even eaten in the last nine years. I felt like I was about to start crying. I did this to my mother. She looks like this because she honestly believes that I have rotted away in a cemetery. I'm a horrible person. Nobody should have to go through this. I saw a tear escape from the corner of her eye. She stood up, and I could clearly see that she was not healthy. She walked over to the fireplace mantle, and picked up a picture. I couldn't believe it. It was our Christmas family picture. My last one with them, before I left with Jared. The last picture of me before I became a monster for somebody I loved.

"My sweet little Cammie. I miss you so" she whispered. I felt a strong urge to run in and grab her. To let her know that everything was going to be okay. Because I'm not dead, and I'm standing twenty feet from her. Edward grabbed my arm.

"C.J. I'm sorry but you know you can't do that" he was listening in on my thoughts. But I'm sure he didn't really need to, because I was positive that the grief was written clearly across my face. I heaved out a heavy sigh. I couldn't be here too much longer. The need to go in and hold my poor mother just once more was overbearing. Edward cupped my chin with his hand and pulled my gaze to meet his.

"This C.J. is why I knew this would be a bad idea, but I also knew it would be good for you". I heard what sounded like her heart speed up. I snatched my eyes from Edward in time to see my mother collapse to the ground.. Searing pain shot through me as I dove through the thick window. Before I knew what had happened, I was through the massive window separating us.

"MOM NO" I screamed running to her. I scooped her frail body up in my arms. She looked so peaceful. This couldn't be happening. God PLEASE DON'T LET HER DIE. I could feel her blood running cold, and I knew I had a drastic choice to make. Edward is going to be angry, but damn it this is my mother. I am not going to let her die in my arms. I leaped out the window, with Edward hot on my trail yelling at me.

"C.J. YOU CANT DO THIS" I ignored him and ran faster.

I burst through the emergency room doors carrying my mom in my arms. Edward gave up trying to stop me, and just tried to keep up with me. Smart choice. The doctor looked at me astonished.

"Not right now" I yelled "Help her". The doctor nodded and pulled out a stretcher, as two nurses came in. I watched them push her away. I couldn't lose my mother. Not now. I just got to see her. She looked so weak and fragile. I almost couldn't stay in the waiting room, but I knew I would have to face Edward sooner or later. He came over and put his hand on my back. He lead me towards a chair, and I sat. He started pacing in front of me. Ranting and mumbling something under his breath. I could have listened to what he was saying , but I didn't think I really wanted to know. He stopped, and I looked up at him. When he took in the expression of worry on my face his anger melted away.

"What's our story going to be?" he asked finally sitting down in the chair beside me. I sighed. At least he isn't angry with me.

"C.J. I understand" I spun quickly in my seat to look at him. Did he really just say that?

"I would have done the same, had it been my mother" he sighed and leaned back "Now we just have to figure out how we are going to explain this" It took me a while to come up with anything that would even be remotely believable.

"Excuse me?" It was the woman behind the desk. The only thing I could thinks was 'Great, we are dead. She recognizes me'. Edward stiffled a chuckled beside me.

"She only wants you to fill out some papers" I looked at him confused. _What papers?_

"The ones you need to permit a patient into a hospital". Oh.

I walked up to the small window, and the woman handed me a clipboard with a pen attached, and several pieces of paper. This shouldn't be too hard. I know practically everything about my mother.

"So" I whispered as I sat back down. He looked up "Our story is…"

_My name is Kristen, and you're Ben._

He gave me a confused look.

_They are my cousins names. They have never been to visit, so it's not like anyone can call us out on it. My family use to always tell me how much me and Kristen favor each other. Anyway, we stopped by for a quick visit, and we saw her fall._

_I have no clue how we are going to explain the broken window. But maybe nobody will ask…_

He nodded.

"You know you could have been a little more creative, though" he whispered over my shoulder. I looked up from the papers in my lap, and gave him a glare.

"You should go call Carlisle, and tell him where we are" I said focusing back on the clipboard in front of me. I saw him stand up out of the corner of my eye, and heard the sliding doors open. A gush of wind came in as he stepped out. I finished filling out the papers, and walked back to the counter to hand them to the woman. She smiled and took them. I went and sat back down. Edward wasn't back yet so I was free to think, without having him listen in. I was extremely worried about my mom. I never knew her to be ill, she was always healthy as a horse. She was the one who was constantly on my dad's back about eating right. I stopped my trail of thought as I heard the sliding glass doors open. Edward came in, and sat down next to me.

"Carlisle is almost here" he whispered "He said Alice had a vision, and knew where we'd be. She's with him". I sighed. Se probably just didn't want to be left behind. Edward nodded.

I jumped up as soon as the doctor came back into the waiting room. Edward stiffened. Not good, at all. I might not want to hear what happened after all. No. I will be strong. He approached me, and pulled his white mask off his face.

"I'm afraid" he stumbled over his words "That her heart has failed". I sucked in a massive breath, and Edward grabbed me before I fell to the ground.

"We can however do surgery" My head snapped back up "But it is very risky, and very expensive, and we would need a new heart within the next forty-eight hours". I nodded vigorously. I would do what ever it takes, even if it meant selling my home. If my heart was any good, I would have given it to her. Wait. We could change her. I felt Edward smack me in the back of my head. Right, bad idea.

"How much exactly?" Edward asked the doctor.

"Well any other transplant surgery would not cost as much as a heart transplant" he said, almost as if he regretted it himself "But a heart transplant is roughly around five-hundred…thousand". I gasped. Oh my god. My mother is never going to make it through this.

"Put her name on the list now" Edward said. Was he crazy? I don't have that kind of money. I don't have _any_ money. Was he planning to pay for it himself? He nodded.

"Oh my god EDWARD" I screamed wrapping my arms tightly around him.

"Thank you thank you than you than-" he clapped his hand over my mouth.

"Kristen you are forgetting, my name is Ben" He laughed. Oh crap, forgot.

I spun around as I heard the rest of them come in. Bella came running up to me, and hugged me tightly.

"I'm so sorry" she moaned. When I pulled back I noticed who all was here. I really hope we all fit in the Mercedes.

"So what's the verdict" Carlisle asked stepping in front of them.

"She needs a new heart within the next forty-eight hours" Edward said. Carlisle's eyes widened.

"What does that mean Carlisle?" I asked tugging on his arm. He finally composed himself and looked down at me.

"It means dear, that we need to find a heart" he said. Bella slapped Carlisle's arm.

"Carlisle you know better than to scare us like that" she said.

"Where are we going to find a heart?" Edward asked. I looked back at him. He looked concerned. Carlisle's lips twitched into a thoughtful expression. Great this is going to take a while. I walked back over and sat back in my previous chair. They all followed taking up seat around me.

Edward turned, and did a double take on me. Great. Not a good sign.

"We have to go now" he whispered "Your eyes are…well you know". I didn't think about it sooner. I'm starting to extremely hate my power…even more than I already did. I jumped up from the chair, and followed Edward out of the hospital, keeping my gaze to the ground.

"I'm sorry C.J. I know it's been a rough day for you" he said. You think? Today has been the Armageddon of all days. I'm honestly surprised that Edward -being practically my best friend- hasn't spontaneously combusted into mini little Michael Jackson's running all over the place. He chuckled, and grabbed my arm twisting me around to look at him. I smiled at the expression on his face. It was clear he didn't particularly like the thoughts of the people standing around us. Of what they were thinking if me…and him.

"We need to go hunt really fast…or at least leave so people won't notice that your eyes are demonic looking" I glared at him. He though my eyes looked demonic looking?

"Oh thanks so much Edward" the sarcasm was clear in my voice. He chuckled and grabbed my arm, taking off into the trees just a few yards away. We ran at full speed. Hopefully nobody actually noticed, but I'm sure nobody would believe them anyway. So it really didn't matter. We stopped after we got a good two miles into the forest.

Edward sulked past me. I couldn't help but laugh. He looked like a pissed off teenager. He spun around, and starred at me like I was crazy.

"Edward you know you're like my best friend, and there isn't anything I would do for you but" I said, he stopped pacing "you are hilarious when you are mad…or confused…or-" he cut me off with his hand.

"Thank so much" he said smiling. I knew he wasn't talking about me laughing at him anymore. I smiled.

"You and your family mean a lot to me" I sounded like an overly emotional soap opera "If it wasn't for you all. I don't know what I'd be by now". A flicker of emotions played across his face. There were so many things I wanted to ask him, and now seemed to be the time to do it.

"Edward?"

"Yes?"

"What was it that made you change Bella?" His face went blank. I think I just hit a nerve. Maybe I should have started with something simpler.

"When Nessa was born" he paused quickly raking his fingers through his hair "I always knew I was going to have to change her, but…"

"But what?" I hedged him on.

"But I was putting it off. So when I had to deliver Nessa I knew Bella wasn't going to make it through human. I had to change her" Now it made sense. Nessa was the real reason why Bella was a vampire. Jared was always skeptical about changing me, but he was just afraid he wouldn't have the resistance, or I would leave him once I was. Poor naïve Jared. I miss you. He hopped up from the ground. I didn't even notice him sit down.

"C.J. you are very different" he said walking towards me.

"Different how?" I asked suddenly feeling self-conscious.

Then I smelt it again. That same familiar terrible odor. No. Please, no.

Edward ducked into a low crouch. He knew exactly what it was. I grabbed his shirt and stood him up.

"Edward we can't fight. There are easily five if not more" I yelled over his snarling. He looked at me, and composure ran over his face.

"You're right" he sighed looking down. I tugged on his arm.

"Now isn't the time to feel guilty. We need to go" I whispered, hoping dearly that they were farther away.

Just then, seven massive beasts stepped out from the shadows of the trees. They were easily twenty feet away from us. I latched onto him with all of my might.

"_Edward_" I squeaked. It was like horrible Déjà vu. He turned his gaze back to me.

"C.J. _run_" he whispered.


	6. Gone

_**Chapter 6**__ Gone.._

He saw the climax of those words as soon as it left his lips. My knees buckled under me, and I felt him scoop me up, and start to run. The flashbacks were coming back so vividly and strong I couldn't stop them.

_Flashback_

_I could feel the swift breeze ruffle the hem of my dress, as I sat waiting. We were finally getting our alone time. I have missed Jared so much these past couple of weeks. It seemed like he was always busy doing something. Whether it was working, hunting, studying, etc._

_I heard a rustle behind me as I saw Jared come back into sight._

"_You're always gone" I pouted. He chuckled and scooped me off the ground planting me on my feet._

"_It's ok love. We have the whole night to ourselves" he whispered. The whole night. That sounded perfect to me. He walked over and hit play on a little stereo. The music that flowed from the speakers made my heart jump. My favorite song: Your Guardian Angel by The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus. It was perfect for dancing. I'm so lucky I have him. He smiled a seductive smile, and sauntered towards me. He pulled me into his arms as I draped my arms around him. I just wish everyday could be like this. We moved slowly tempo, him trying to up it and spin me, which didn't work. Every sway made my breathing hitch._

"_I'll never get tired of that" he whispered into my hair. He moved so gracefully and perfect. I love everything about him. I stood up on my tip-toes and planted a kiss on his nose. He laughed._

"_What was that for?" he asked. I smiled._

"_Well, excuse me" I said trying to act defensive "I didn't know I had to have permission to kiss you"._

"_You don't love" he sighed. He bent down and our lips met in to middle. It was so carefree. I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulling him closer to me. He pulled back after a few minutes, and I pouted. He chuckled at my expression. I flicked him on the nose and he laughed harder. If I would flicked a human like that it would have rammed through their skull._

"_Sorry. You are just so cute when your mad" he said still laughing. I sighed and leaned my head against his shoulder, as we danced into another song. _

_I heard something rustle in the trees behind me and a twig snap. I snapped my head around, and Jared was by my side in a flash. He ran over to cut off the music, and was by my side in less than a second. I smelled a horrible mildewed odor that I remembered from our previous home. The huge creatures stepped out into the clearing each one flanking at one's side. A huge black one in the middle. I saw pure hatred cover every perfect crevice of Jared's face. A terrifying sound ripped through the beast that made me shake. Jared grabbed my arm and threw himself in front of me._

"_Jared we need to run. There are too many" I whispered. He didn't change his defensive position, and I was silently wondering why these things haven't made a leap for us yet. He flipped his head towards me with panic in his face._

"_C.J. RUN" he switched his focus back on wolves as they started to close in. he was crazy if he honestly thought I was leaving him here alone to face this._

"_No Jared I'm not leaving you" I screamed. He sighed and grabbed my hand. We took off into the forest hearing their snaps and growls behind us. He let go of my hand so we could run faster. I kept running until I could no longer smell the beasts. I jumped into the nearest tree and climbed it, sitting on a branch. Jared was sure ti show up within the next couple of minutes if I'm lucky, and not those wolves. I heard a sound ripple through the trees and shatter my heart. It was Jared's scream. He was in pain._

"_NOOOOO" I screamed, jumping from the top of the tree. What could they be doing to him? Then I heard the final sound. It sounded like metal being ripped up. The noise twisted my stomach. That couldn't be what I think it is. Flashes of images passed through my mind, of what it could be. I screamed, running faster, hoping my imagination was playing a sick joke on me, and I would see Jared…alive…_

_End of Flashback_

"NO JAREDD!!" I screamed. I felt Edward shudder. I couldn't believe after all this time of trying to block it out, that memory could come up so quickly. And vividly. It was almost like I was there again seeing him. I felt the spot where my heart should be twist in agony. My whole body shook. My dry sobs making me shake violently.

"It's Ok C.J." I heard Edward's voice trying to calm me. I felt a shudder of sobs as they raked through my body.

"I'm so sorry" he whispered "I wasn't thinking"

I realized we had stopped moving. I opened my eyes, and realized we were in the car. I was sprawled across Edward and Bella's laps. Alice was sitting in the front seat looking in the back at me. I felt so embarrassed by just letting my emotions take control of me like that.

"Don't be" Edward said startling me "You needed to let it out". I sighed and slumped back in his lap. Bella raked her blood-red nails softly back and forth on my arm trying to soothe me. I sat straight up as soon as my mind was cleared, and I remember one important detail.

"Carlisle where is my mom?" It surprised me how weak my voice sounded.

"Don't freak out C.J." He replied from the driver's seat. Don't freak out? My mother could die and he doesn't want me to freak out? "A gunshot victim was brought in a few hours ago. They lost him about thirty minutes after you disappeared. Your mother is in surgery right now". I felt my body relax slightly. But shouldn't we be there to make sure she pulls through?

"Alice has already seen that she will. And the hospital has called your uncle. He will be there to help her when she stabilizes" Alice nodded her head vigorously from the front seat. She would be ok thanks to me, and of course Edward's money. If we hadn't been there…..there is no telling how long it would have been before she was even found, let alone taken to get help. I smiled. At least that was one good thing today. Not really enough to balance it out, but enough to make me feel a little better. But those wolves. Those freaky scary, nightmarish wolves. They followed me. Why do they want me so bad. I'm not that special. I was beginning to think about earlier, and try to put some pieces together when Edward grabbed my arm.

"C.J. just forget about it before you put yourself through that again" he whispered. I nodded. He was right. I at least needed to wait to get the recent mishap out of my system, before causing myself anymore pain.

When the car stopped at the several minutes later I was still laying across Edward and Bella. They didn't mind, and it did make me feel a little less crappy. The rest of the family was waiting for us in the yard. When I stepped out of the car I felt my feet leave the ground. Emmett picked me up and squeezed me to his chest.

"Don't ever scare us like that again" he said putting me back down. The were honestly worried about me, and I could tell by the looks on their faces. But why? I'm a freak. A freak with a freaky power that's trying to get me to drink my non-existing blood in me.

"Sorry everyone" I mumbled looking down at my shoes. My ugly pink shoes. Edward busted out laughing behind me. I spun around to see what was so funny, but he just shook his head, and I heard him mutter something that sounded like 'ha shoes'. What was so funny about that? Oh well. That's Edward for you. What can you do but love him? Jacob came running out of the house just then. Oh yay. More wolves. Just what I needed.

"Hey are we going to C.J.'s house or what?" he asked so carefree, like I wasn't standing eight feet from him giving him a death glare. I freaking hate wolves.

_Edward please tell him to make space before I do something that will get me kicked out._

"Jacob" Edward said quickly "You and I will go ahead and scope". thank you Edward. Jacob nodded and took off into the woods. When I saw him come back out as a wolf, I freaked.

"AHHHHHHHH" I screamed jumping several feet in the air. Emmett caught me and set me back on my feet, then buckled over laughing. Thanks a bunch Emmett, I thought sourly.

"Don't EVEN come near me" I screamed at the wolf. Emmett started laughing harder, with others joining him now. Edward took off into the direction of the forest, and then they both disappeared into the trees. This is one messed up world.

"Emmett it's not funny" I yelled smacking him in the back of the head, when couldn't stop laughing. Rosalie covered her mouth to hide a chuckle. That made me start laughing which didn't help Emmett. I finally got control and Emmett stopped laughing only to snicker every time I did anything. I was going to have a hard time living that down.

Me, Bella, and Esme were the only ones not allowed to go. Everyone else was at my house sniffing around while we just got to sit here, and look at each other. I stood up quickly, startling them. I walked over to the huge white piano sitting in the living room, and just decided to wing it. I had played piano when I was human. My mom bought me lessons and all that jazz, but my heart was never really in it. I sat down and began playing the first thing that came to my mind. I closed my eyes and just let he music take over me. It was beautiful, and I recognized the tune. The song just flowed out of me, like that's what it needed to do. I felt a hand grip my shoulder, and opened my eyes to see Bella sitting beside me smiling widely. I think she might know this song. I was playing the song from the night at the meadow. My favorite song, and it always would be just because of the memory of the last time I had heard it. I would never forget his touch, and the way it made me feel when he told me he loved me. I would never forget any of his memories, but I don't need to live on them. It only causes unwanted pain. I leaned against the piano as the song came to an end.

"C.J.?" it was Edward. Apparently they were back now. I sat up quickly.

"Edward I'm so sorry I know I should have asked" I apologized. Edward shook his head.

"It's ok I honestly don't care" he said sitting beside me "I just didn't know you could play" I sat back up and gingerly pressed one fingertip to a random key.

"I've never been great" I mumbled "I just had a sudden urge". He chuckled, and it surprised me. My head snapped up.

"That's how I play" he explained "I never really plan to. It just comes to me, and I play it" I grinned sheepishly back down at the piano. Music has always been my outlet to just about everything. Either playing it or just listening to it. It always made the situation a little better.

"Come with me" Edward said grabbing my hand, and pulling me up. I followed him upstairs, and down the hallway. We walked past several doorways before he turned. I turned to walk in and my jaw dropped. Edward chuckled and put a finger under my chin pushing it closed. His room was amazing. Two of his wall was cover ceiling to floor with records, and CDs. I walked closer and noticed that they were in order. There were tons of varieties. Everything. Some dating back to the forty's. I grabbed a record I was more familiar with from that time.

"May I?" Edward grabbed it from my hand, and walked over and put it on the player. The whole room filled instantly with the music. Moonlight Serenade by Glenn Miller flowed easily from the huge speaker. It didn't sound like it was very old.

"I take very good care of my music" Edward said pointing around to walls "If you cant tell"

Yes I could. I could tell that Edward loved his music, but you couldn't tell by just having a conversation with him. I had no clue he had this much music. The end of the song brought me back to reality.

"Did you…..find anything?" I asked timidly. He looked up from the record case still in his hand.

"Yes" his voice was toneless. Not a good sign.

"Well…." I hedged. He couldn't just leave me hanging like that.

"Jacob said the scent was very old but" he paused. Oh crap "These wolves are not like them….they have a foreign scent". Wait did he just say wolves?

Oh my god. Do I have some kind of freaking wolf target on my forehead, or just extremely bad luck?

"It seems like both" Edward said seriously.

"That sounds just peachy" I sighed. Edward came up next to me, and surprisingly put his hand over mine.

"We are going to get through this ok?" he said looking me in the eyes. I couldn't help but nod. It was like a non-thought process. I sighed, and walked to the other side of the room, planting myself on his couch.

"Let's play twenty questions" he lifted one eyebrow "Oh just humor me"

"Alright" he said walking over to the couch "twenty each?" I nodded.

"That's how it goes". He crossed his arms across his chest as I thought about what I would ask him.

"How old are you?" I finally came up with one that didn't sound too nosey. I would get up to those. He smiled at my attempt.

"I am very old" he laughed. Very old? "I was changed at seventeen, but I am actually one-hundred sixteen years old" My eyes grew wide. Holy crap. He is really old. I'm only twenty-eight.

"Oh darn you ruined my question" he said laughing. I rolled my eyes. So my question was not very creative, but I would get to those, and he would be wishing I had stuck with boring questions then.

"Ok my turn" he said pulling me out of my thoughts. I waited. He was taking a long time. I had a feeling I wasn't going to like his question too much.

"Today would be nice Mr. Cullen" I teased. He smirked.

"Ok what is one thing you regret most?" he asked surprising me. I didn't really think I regretted anything. But I did…

"I regret letting go of his hand…" I whispered.

He started to say something but I cut him off.

"My turn" I said sitting up "What are the differences between the La Push pack, and the pack that?….well you know" He nodded.

"The pack in La Push are not suppose to harm us, because we are different from nomads" I rose my eyebrow. We were different. That didn't stop the other wolves "we have a treaty. We aren't allowed to change our diet, and they aren't allowed to harm us". Now it made sense. It must be a pretty restrained pack. For them to stop long enough to talk to a vampire before ripping their necks out.

Jasper walked in followed by a jumpy Alice. Great, she saw shopping in our future, it was written all over her face.

"C.J. me, you and Bella are going….wait for it…-" Alice's chirpy voice made her sound like an eight year old.

"Let me guess Alice….SHOPPING" I sighed. She nodded and strolled over to my side.

"What's the matter C.J." she asked. Everything. Why di these wolves want me so freaking bad. I never did anything. Or were they just wanting to attack me before I attacked them for killing Jared. Normally vampires avenge their mate. And I should, and I would if I ever got the chance. They are probably just trying to kill me before….

"Edward" I said. He was apparently following my thoughts.

"What's new" Jasper asked startling me.

"You'll see" Edward said "I think C.J. just figured how we are going to get rid of this 'wolf problem' ".

Jasper's eyes grew wide.

"Jasper what is it?" I asked. He backed away and flew out of the room. Edard took off after him. Great more mysteries. Alice gave me a worried look, and we both followed after them.

"Which way?" Alice asked stopping at the forest line. She expected me know? She saw the confusion on my face.

"The last person you touched…Edward….concentrate. See if you can work your power" she explained. Now I see what she was saying. I closed my eyes tightly and focused hard. In my mind I saw flashes of Edward. Edward in his room, Edward at the piano, in the hallway, in his room. It worked.

_She is taking a long time. I hope we aren't wasting time trying to figure out her power._

"Ok Alice I'm ready" I whispered opening my eyes carefully "We aren't wasting time, but we do need to hurry". Hey eyes grew wide.

_It worked. Yay. I'm brilliant._

_Separate._ I nodded and took off to the left.

"Edwaard. Jaaaassspperrrr" I heard her yelling "Where are youuuuu?"

I rolled my eyes and continued to run until I couldn't hear anyone anymore. I slowed my pace. Stopped, and looked around. I was in the middle of the forest, and I had no idea where.

Run.

I should run. Just incase.

I sucked in a deep breath and picked up my pace.

I slowed when I heard Edward's thoughts come into hearing range.

_Where is she? Where is she? Oh my god._

I sped to Edward and he looked up at me astonished. I stopped right in front of him. His face was twisted into confusion.

"Where is who Edward?" I asked.

_How did she know? Wait she must have used her power. Wait…_

"Yes Edward I was able to control my power enough to find you" I explained.

"Now who is missing"

He looked down at the ground, and I felt the control on my power slowly slip. Great now I have to force it out of him.

"At least tell me why you took off like that" I said grabbing his arm. He looked me in the eyes and I felt immediate sorrow for him. Pain was written all across his face.

"Jasper felt a great wave of grief, and I saw in his mind it was coming from Bella" he explained "I took off after him. I hoped I could find her….but" his gaze dropped back to the ground.

"Edward, but what?" I asked "Is Bella missing. Did she run away?" he shook his head.

"Nessa" he whispered.


	7. Meet the Pack

_**Chapter 7**__Meet the Pack_

"Oh. My. God" I whispered slumping to the ground. Nessa is missing? How did this even happen?

"No Nessa isn't missing….Jacob took her" Edward sneered. I knew the hostility in his voice was towards the boy….the one I warned them about.

No werewolf should be a vampires friend. It's against nature and just not right.

"You're right" he said, getting up from the ground, and pulling me up "I should have just let you rip the beast's neck out". I smiled. Maybe when they come back I can finally do that.

"If they come back" My eyes shot to him.

"What do you mean 'if'? Nessa can get away at least can't she?" I assumed that since Nessa had vampire in her, and Jacob is a pansy, she could put up a good fight. He shook his head.

I took off. I will find my friend, and when I do I will kill Jacob.

I focused all of my energy and power on Edward. I closed my eyes and pulled up my last encounter with him, and the wolves to give me extra anger. Not that I needed any. Nobody hurt my family like this. Nobody.

_Why Jacob? Why did you take my baby? _It was Bella. I could tell from her thoughts. I sped up to see her sitting on the ground shaking. I ran to her quickly grabbing her in a tight hug.

_I just want my baby back. _More sobs

"Bella" I try soothing her "It's going to be alright. I will find Nessa and bring her home". She stopped shaking and looked up to meet my eyes.

"C.J. It's too dangerous" she whispered "I don't want you to get hurt" ha hurt. Jacob doesn't know who he's dealing with.

"Bella just trust me" I groaned "Now tell me what happened. How did he get away with her?". She started shaking, and broke down into more sobs, as she handed me her phone. I grabbed it and twisted it around in my hands trying to figure it out. I finally got it open to the messages, and read the last one received. It was from Nessa.

It read:

**mommy dont be angry w/me. Its too dangerous for me to be with you guys anymore. Jacob is going to keep me safe. dont worry. I love you**

**Nessa**

I gasped and dropped the phone. That's what Edward meant when he said 'if they come back'. Nessa doesn't want to come back. Because of me. And she's right. Every day I spend here is just more dangerous than the last. Every second I'm here this family is in constant danger….because of me.

"Don't even think about it" I twisted around. It was Jasper.

How did he know? I must have been feeling extremely guilty. I tensed up hoping I didn't seem to guilty, that he might have figured out what I was about to do.

Edward came up behind Jasper, and I let out a scream.

"Chill out" he muttered. Clearly he was still in his mood.

"You scared the crap out of me Edward" I yelled. He smirked.

"Then your hearing is shot" he said simply. I had a thought about slapping that smirk off his face. He wasn't acting like himself and it was starting to piss me off. He walked over to where Bella still crumpled up, and scooped her up in his arms. She clung to him tightly burying her face in his shirt, still shaking.

He attempted to soothe to no avail. She had this look. You would have thought Nessa had died, the way she was crying. Edward shot me an anxious glance at me. That was odd.

"If the feelings I'm getting from his are correct. Edward is seeing first-hand what she was like when we left her all those years ago" jasper whispered to me. I jumped back. Edward had left Bella? They were so much in love though, and you could tell just by the way they look at each other.

"He _left _her?" Jasper nodded.

"It was a tough time for all of us. We had all grown so accustom to Bella, but Edward said our life was too dangerous for her. We all left" I gasped. I never heard any of this before. Why wouldn't they have told me?

"Because we try to forget it ever happened" It was Edward that spoke.

He was standing in front of us. Bella was still gripping his shirt crying. Why would Nessa put poor Bella through this? I would never have it in me to do something like this to my mother. I nearly got exposed trying to save her. But this… this incident must bring back memories from when Edward left. Poor Bella.

"C'mon**" **Jasper whispered "We better get going before they get worried. Has anyone seen Alice?"

"I'm right here" she whispered looking down, walking towards us, from the shadows in the trees. Where did she come from? Maybe my hearing really is shot? But nobody else heard her either. Jasper grabbed Alice's hand, and I walked quickly ahead of them. If I had to see them the whole way home, I might start spiraling downwards. The house came into view a good eight minutes later. None of us really had it in us to run. It was still faster than a normal pace, but slow for us.

Everything around here was going to be different without Nessa. She was a very unique person, from what I knew of her. We had barely had two conversations, but I already saw her as a sister, and it would hurt me too, with her not being here. Why was Jacob such an influence anyway? I just really hope it's not some sort of trick to get her away from her family.

Carlisle came racing down the steps as soon as we were in view.

"Sam Uley is on his way" he said when he reached us. Edward nodded, and Bella wiggled herself out of his arms.

"Who is that?" I asked. They had mentioned him once before, but nobody ever told me who he was.

"The Alpha of the pack in La Push" Edward answered. Great; werewolves.

"They are all coming. Sam said he doesn't think this pack is civilized". _Gee, what clued him into that one? _I thought sarcastically.

Edward nodded, and grabbed a hold of Bella's hand in an attempt to lead her to the house. She obligated well. I don't think she had the strength to argue in whether or not to stay and see the pack. I should probably leave too. "C.J. it is crucial that you maintain your temper around these wolves. Most of them are older, but they have a few young ones" Carlisle confirmed my plans. I am not staying for this. I was likely to start a huge fight right here in their front yard. I turned on my heel, and headed towards the house. Nobody stopped me, like I though they would have. I was very relieved of that. When I walked into the house, I could feel the immense tension in the air. I felt so out of place, and that me being here wasn't such a good idea anymore. I have already caused them too many issues since I've been here. I'm a jinx to anyone who gets to close to me in my life. I cant even go to the Volturi anymore and have them just end it all because of my newly found power. They would just make me join their precious guard. Is it even fair for one person to deal with so much in one lifetime? What is the pack gonna do to help us resolve this situation anyway? Fight? I seriously doubt it, and that seems to be the only way to get rid of the problem. I have to fight. I stopped my thoughts dead in their track when I saw Edward. He looked at me and cocked one eyebrow.

"What are you hiding from me?" he asked. So I was making him suspicious; great.

"Nothing Edward" I mumbled looking at the ground. He knows I'm lying. I've ALWAYS been a horrible liar. He surprised me by letting out a sigh.

"C.J." I looked up at him "You don't need to feel this way. You have us now and we aren't going to let anything bad happen". If he only actually knew. Apparently my mind was temporarily blocked. I would humor him, if that kept the truth under wraps. I walked forward and pulled him into a hug. He gripped me tightly. I'm going to miss this family so much. But before I do anything….

"Edward can you help me…..learn to control my power?" I did half assume him to be skeptical about. Seeing how I would have blocked him when I did. He nodded. So that was one thing I had for me when I left.

"Where are you going?" he asked looking down at me puzzled. Crap. That wasn't suppose to happen. Stupid temporary, unsteady power.

"I'm not sure Edward" I stuck with the truth "Whenever I have to deal with this life that fate dealt me". His expression changed to worry, understanding immediately that I wasn't about to take a vacation.

"You aren't going to have to face this alone C.J." He whispered pulling me back into a hug. I pulled away, and sulked across to the other side of the room.

"Edward listen to me please" I said when he starting to protest "This. No. Me. No. My Life. Right. My Life is too much for your family to handle. You can't expect to help me out of every situation. That's just the way it is for me. The way is always has been. The way it always will be. Don't get me wrong. I love you and your family so much for everything you have done for me, but I can't…NO _won't_ out your family in danger just because a couple of immature werewolves have a sick goal of making my particular existence extinct. Ok. Don't stop me from trying to do what's right for everyone" . He walked over to me quickly, staring hard at me as if I had just been speaking 'Pig Latin'.

"C.J. you are so much like Bella; you just don't even know" he mumbled. I sighed "I can't let you do that". I looked up to see his piercing eyes staring at me.

"And Edward I can't out your family through this. They want me, so I have to find out why. BY MYSELF" I said grabbing his face to make him listen. He just chuckled at my attempt to be tough.

"You know that no werewolf is going to be intimidated by you" he chuckled.

So he was going to play this. Well I could do it too.

"Well ok Edward let's say for argument's sake I said I did want you guys to come with me. What would be intimidating about that?" He lifted one eyebrow, as if asking 'Why even go there?'.

"Easily the more vampires they won't fight in fear of 'losing a brother'" he answered. I've never even seen a wolf lose, which is what makes me mostly terrified. I don't know If I would have to guts to fight one. I know that they arent like regular wolve. They were made to kill vampires.

"I think you should meet Sam" I shot him a glare. He couldn't be serious. Sam is my enemy. If I start a fight they would all hate me. And besides why would I even want to meet a werewolf? It was already bad enough that I couldn't destroy that other one when I clearly had the chance, but now when I have the choice. OHHHHHHHHH NO. Not happening.

"They are not like the wolves that you are used to" he said referring to my recent thoughts.

"Can you make sure I don't do anything stupid?" I whispered. He nodded. I couldn't believe I was actually saying this but…

"Let's get this over with" he grabbed my hand and pulled me out the door. We ran to the middle of the yard, him pulling the whole way.

"Guys this is C.J." He said pointing to me. It took everything in my control to not snarl or even be slightly aggressive.

"Don't take it personal Sam" Edward said, reading his mind "The only encounters C.J. has had with wolves has been bad". So apparently I wasn't hiding my hostility very well. I forced a smile at the tall russet colored man standing a few feet from me. I need to put on my best face. I need to find out the best way to figure out these wolves. I need to speak for myself.

"Ummm Sam?" Everyonne turned to me shocked "How exactly do we figure out what these wolves want?"

"Well…" he said unsure if he should answer or not "It would be very dangerous for any of the Cullens to be near them, since they seem pretty wild. So we are going to try and figure that out" he was actually concerned about, and what was dangerous. This changed my percpective on these wolves 110%. I gave him a real smile, and he returned it.

"Thank you. It really does mean so much to us. But…" he looked at me puzzled "If it gets violent don't fight. This is my battle. Just get out". He looked confused, but saw that I was serious and nodded. I thought it would be a snow day in hell before I felt concern for my enemy, but I honestly did feel concern for these wolves, standing in front of me. They are actually not wild and crazy. I jumped back when a small boy stepped forward, approaching me. Ok so he wasn't small, but he looked to be the youngest. Edward looked like he was ready to stop me if I did do something.

"Hey I'm Seth" he said reaching out his hand. Should I shake it or not. I didn't want to harm this boy, but I didn't want to be rude. Edward nodded, saying it was ok.

"Hey Seth" I cautiously stuck out my hand and he grabbed it eagerly "How old are you?" I asked before I could stop myself. I was honestly curious thought.

"I'm twenty-four" He looked about mid-twenty's, but younger compared to the others who looked closer to thirty.

"They don't actually age until they stop phasing completely" Sam eyes Edward. I don't think he was comfortable with me knowing these things.

"It's ok Sam" He said looking back to him "C.J. shares our way of life, and she has no reason to change" He looked pleased. So he thought that maybe I would turn into a savage one day, and use that against them? I guess I did deserve that. They didn't know me as well as they apparently knew the Cullens.

Every eyes flashed to me when I took a step back. Something I was dying to ask was just on the tip of my tongue, but I just couldn't do it. But I have to know, and they would probably tell me.

"Why did Jacob take Nessa?" Sam was in mid-sentence talking to Carlisle, but stopped to look at me. The look on his face, gave away that he knew, but he wasn't planning on telling me.

"I will find out eventually Sam, so please just tell me" I whispered. He sighed and nodded.

"Jacob thinks this will turn into a fight. When he got the smell from your house he knew that these wolves were very different from us. He was able to convince her that she needed to go with him". Why would he be so concerned about Nessa? I mean I'm glad he is, but it didn't make any sense.

"Jacob imprinted on Nessa when she was born" Edward said like that would an explanation. As if I actually knew what that meant.

"It's something rare, but it happens to wolves" Sam said seeing the confusion on my face "The first time we see the person we are meant to be with it's our whole world shifts, and nothing matters but keeping them happy and safe no matter what. Right now all Jacob cares about is getting Nessa as far away from the danger as possible" That's the strangest thing I've ever heard.

"And you can imprint on anyone….even vampires?" he nodded.

"It would seem so" he said as if he wished otherwise, but I couldn't entirely hold that against him. I would feel too comfortable if the person I was meant to be with was my mortal emeny. If a werewolf imprinted on me I would kill him. Edward flashed me a look.

"C.J. I need to speak with you really quick" I nodded and he grabbed my hand. We ran up the front porch steps and through the front door. I stopped, and he paced in front of me.

"Ok Edward you are freaking me out here. Spit it out" I said grabbingg him, to make him stop.

"Do you think it might be possible that maybe one of these wolves imprinted on you, and that they are trying to kill you _because_ you are their mortal enemy?" I never thought about that. I never even knew that it could happen until just a few minutes ago. A werewolf imprinting on me? Maybe or maybe…

"Do you think there could be something like completely opposite from imprinting. Like once they see me nothing else matters but making me miserable, killing me, or turning my life into the deep black hole of the abyss of which it has recently turned" He chuckled. So my hypothisis was ridiculous. But at least I was trying. It could be anything at this point, but whatever it was these things were drawn to me for some reason. Something about me is different from any other vampire. It could be my scent, my way of life, my power, or just my luck.

"I don't think so" Edward said still laughing. Ok so my theory was a little strange, but not that bad.

"Ok Edward it not that funny. You cant stop laughing at my expense" I yelled popping him in the back of his head with my hand. He straightened up quickly.

"Sorry C.J." he was still smiling though.

"You are just like Emmett sometimes Edward, I swear" his eyes widened. Apparently he didn't think so….

"No. No It's not you it's…." He looked distant as he walked away. What was going on with him? He's not acting like himself. I followed him out into the kitchen. Jasper and Alice were sitting it there. Jasper sitting on the counter top looking to the floor, Alice standing by his side holing his hand that wasn't ruffled in his blonde locks. Alice looked at us briefly before turning her eyes to something distant, trying to hide her moments of non-chirpyness.

"Jasper why do you think that?" Jasper's head shot up, and looked at us surprised.

"Jasper what aren't you telling me?" Alice whispered horrified. I looked at to see her literally falling apart. Nessa'a absence was coming down hard on Alice.

"It's nothing…I just don't think this is all going to turn out how we hope. The pack is having such a wide range of emotions, it's hard not to let it get to me" he tried callming Alice by pulling her closer to him, and running his hand up and down her back.

"I guess I don't really blame you" Everyone looked at me shocked as I spoke. Really what hope was there? That the pack would somehow mysteriously stop these crazed teenage wolves from shredding us? And them…

"We have to think positive" Edwar said grabbing my arm "I should check on Bella".

"I'll come too" He nodded. I followed him up the stairs and through the hallway as their room slowly came into view. I could distinctly hear Bella's sobs. They aren't as loud and uncontrollable, but enough to make me feel the pain radiating from her. Edward puched the door open to reveal Bella in the middle of her bed curled up in a tiny ball. Her eyes were closed, but we knew she wasn't sleeping. Edward walked over and sat on the bed next to her. She opened her eyes and sat up. She looked so sad, and weak. Like all hope was gone, before there even was any. I walked over and took a seat on the other side of her. She grabbed me and wrapped me in a hug.

"C.J. I'm so sorry you have to see me like this. I just cant seem to pull myself out of the thought that my little girl isn't coming home" I slowly patted her back, and shot a panicked look at Edward. His face mimicked mine. She sat back and slowly forced herself to smile, but it melted away quickly.

"Don't be ridiculous" I copied Edward's words from earlier "I cant say that I know how you feel Bella but that we will help you make it through this". I wasn't sure I had chosen the right words, but she smiled.

My head snatched up as I heardd Emmett come through the door. It seemed like it had been forever since I'd seen him. He looked at me then twisted his head to Edward. Edward nodded and stood motioning for me to follow. I hated leaving Bella like that, but Edward wouldn't have, had it not been important. I followed them out into the back yard. Emmet twisted around and gave me a frightening smile. I chuckled and lunged into him throwing him to the ground. He laughed and lifted me up just to throw me back to the ground. He was a lot stronger than he looked.

"As much fun as wrestling sounds right now" he said the next in a much lower voice "And as much as I'd rather be doing that"

Edward cleared his throat, and Emmett laughed.

"We are training" Edward finished. I nodded. Trainging is good. Training will help me control my power. Edward grabbed my hand and pulled me farther into the yard. We sat on the grass, and watched the rare sunlight turn our skin into diamonds, as the clouds drifted by.

"Ok I need you to focus" he said "I'm here for your power. Emmett is here for the physical" I nodded and closed my eyes. This sounded pretty easy so far.

Emmett would teach me to fight and Edward would teach me to use my power. I felt him grab my hand from my lap.

"Now whatever power you want to use I need you to focus on the person who had it" I had done that before "I just don't recommend human" I chuckled. I wasn't planning on doing that.

I chose Alice. Her power is the only one I havent used. I closed my eyes focusing all of my thoughts on Alice. All the memories I had of her. Memories came flooding back. I saw Alice in the living room the first time we met. Alice in her bedroom and bathroom dressin me for school. Alice in Edward's bedroom. In the forest….

_I saw myself walking through the forest and looking. I could see my lips moving, but I couldn't hear a thing. But what was I looking for. I was with someone, because I was talking to someone, but there was nobody there. I saw something and started to run. I was running now as fast a I could…but there was nothing I could see behind me._

Edward was staring off when I finally opened my eyes.

"Edward what does that mean?" he looked down at me. I could see panic written all over his face.

"It means we don't have as much time as I though. You have to learn a lot…and quickly" he whispered looking back down at the grass.


End file.
